Random Photos of Grands from February

 I haven't felt much like blogging. 

It seems pointless to say - another day - grief and joy - living together. 

People surely are tired of hearing me say, "I miss Josiah," and yet, how do I write without mentioning the tension we live in these days? 

Then I took a look at all these magical photos which have showed up on my phone and google photos account. 

This is a family journal. 

It's time to journal life - and if it bores people - they certainly don't have to read. ::snort:: 

Here are very visible manifestations of our hearts! Yep, just random photos of the grands...some I clicked, some were sent by their parents. Assume the REALLY cute ones were taken by parents. ::snort:: 

It's fitting Josi Faith begins our photo show. She joined the family on Feb. 7th, and I've yet to blog her arrival. She's such a joy to the entire family.  Olivia is a fantastic big sister. Carrie caught this shot and shared. 

Josi and Livie

Such a huggable baby girl! 

Painting with the boys - after Feb 14th - not quite sure when. LOL Arielle has resigned from her job and I no longer have a weekly date with the boys. We'll have to do something about that soon...after they settle into life with their new darling. 

Budding artists

Check out the cool hat Aunt Co-co brought home from her travels for Jo-jo! 

This has been a big month for Trudy (above and below). She proved she had the climbing gene all of BreZaak's kids have had...and by the end of February she is PUBLICALLY doing what we all knew she was doing in secret - walking! 

One Sunday several were sick at our home. Stacia and I didn't feel like wrestling GG up the ramp at our church in Eagle River.  It's tricky. We opted to find Cory and Arielle and go to a new church with them. After church we went out to dinner... It was a nice Sunday. 

Charles and Benny

Danny entertained us with creamer shots! LOL 

I get a kick out of seeing how the boys dress each week.  Benny has always been quite serious about his unique style and the younger two have picked up the habit. Today, they all had plaid shirts, khakis, boots, and floppy boat hats from Aunt Co-co. Benny added a tie as it was an extra-special Sunday. 

Josi's first week at church. 

Jared, GG and Noah 

Kicking back at home! This little guy has a BIG PERSONALITY! He's a delight. 

Seesters! 

Um...so yes, Josi is a mixture of Carrie and Josiah. She obviously  has inherited the Gherkin Scowl! Genetics are strong. She's also long and thin...and she has her Daddy's dimples.

Such a sweetheart! Are you tired of grand photos? I have more. 

Alaska weather tried to fake us out this year. February was beautiful. We had several weeks of temps above freezing. CoRielle took the opportunity to get outside! 

Benny finished his school year on the last day of February! March is baby month in their home. 

Noah loves his dinner! LOL 

Nancy, a friend for our very first USAF assignment at Malmstrom AFB, made the girls these matching pants! 

On Mondays Stacia has a huge chunk of time between her classes. She could come home but has been staying in town and studying and skiing at a local park. One day she used the break to go to BreZaak's and go sledding with the kids! 

Jojo

Annie

Stacia and Bella

Such a sweet boy!

 Trudy has been enjoying some time in her chair up close to the others during school time. Those counting bears are the BEST for keeping toddlers happy during table school. 

Precious Trudy! 

Josi may have gotten bored at Life group but she was stylin for sure! 

Pastor Brian asked me a month or so ago where I was finding joy these days. I didn't have a ready answer - it's a loaded question in this season. But - this - family, the continuation of LIFE is certainly a big place where Michael and I find joy. 

The thing I'm learning is even in the best of times...there is a shadow, a tinge of sadness. That is o.k. In fact, the tension of allowing grief and joy to exist together adds dimension and depth to my relationship with Jesus. I've been meeting with a counselor. He is impressed at my determination to live present, not gaslight emotions and call it faith, to fully experience both the joy and the sadness at the same time.  He reminded me yesterday many Christians have confused the definitions of grief and joy. We think joy is the absence of pain and grief. We think grief is the absence of joy.  However, they are very separate entities and when dealing with such a complex and traumatic loss it is GOOD to feel both together. Whew. I've got that going for me. ::snort::  

Random February Snippets

 Here are some things which happened in February that I did not blog but don't wish to lose from our journal. 

Jared and Noah logged in excess of 60 miles knocking on doors in their district. Jared is running for State Senate. 

Who could resist that face? 

Jamin invited the sibs over to his new Eagle River apartment. I hear it was a fun time. There are pros and cons to any location, but I know Jamin is happy to be closer to JaRissa and Carrie and the girls. 

Stacia came home one day with all the supplies to paint a pot and plant some basil. She's got a healthy plant under the lights at this point. 

These "warm days" and cool nights mean our driveway turns into a skating rink. Michael spends hours chipping ice, creating ditches for the water to flow, shoveling snow out of the way, scattering snow onto dry places so it can melt.... They say we aren't in true break up yet - but who really knows????

Michael and I have made a point to find time in the schedule to stay connected with friends. Nora (left) now lives way out in the village but was in town for a couple of days. It was great fun to meet up with h er and Yadira for breakfast! 

This is what "spring" looks like around here...no daffodils or tulips in my yard yet. 

Fixing the weather station so we can get accurate wind info from our deck. 

THIS was a highlight of the month. Izaak and Bre were out on a date to celebrate their anniversary. They called to see if we wanted to meet up with them to enjoy some time together just the four of us! 

YES...Ten years of marriage for BreZaak - 40 for us!  It was worth breaking the sugar rule! LOL 

Sundays

We continue to attend church with Carrie, the girls, Jamin, Jared and his family, and Krista and her family. After service we usually get to catch lunch with at least one of the kids...sometimes all of us...and then we most often make our way over to spend a bit of time with Carrie and the girls. It's hard to believe sweet Josi has only been in our arms for 11 days. I can't imagine the family without her. 

Sometime in the afternoon we head back to the valley and catch a quick dinner and relax with movies and ice cream.  These are the most leisurely, peaceful Sundays Michael and I have ever experienced in our 40 years of marriage.  As a professor at Alaska Bible College said, "The church bulletin is no longer a to do list." We loved our years of service; we are loving our season of rest. I have no doubt at some point we'll be serving again...in some capacity. For now, we rest, connect and heal.