Dip Netting 2024 - Day 1

 The week before dipnetting is ALWAYS frantic...but this was a bit more than normal. We have reached the spot where we no longer have a gang at home helping to prep. Both girls were busy with work and such...if it weren't for Cory and Arielle's and Jamin's help the past few days, I'm not sure we would have made it. BUT, we made it.  

Alex showed up at 1000 to be briefed for staying with GG at the house. 

CoRielle showed up shortly afterwards and Arielle, Benny, Danny, Ellie and Stacia headed down the road. Cory headed off.  

We checked RV systems - Allie was willing albeit a bit apprehensive to assist Michael. 

 Ten minutes after Cory left, we pulled out of the driveway...we were the FIRST ones to arrive. ::snort:: We did not speed. We simply didn't make any stops. Before we knew it the three of us were backing into our site. 

The next hour was filled with setting up. We had the RV situated before anyone arrived. Cory and Arielle both showed up. We set up two shade covers and our 3-room tent. We had planned to have two tents - our site is plenty big. They wanted $75 per tent, per night. I knew we could put the 3 room tent up and it would count as one as we've done that the past five years. We put up the 3 room tent and put the two tents inside of it...which gives them extra protection for the forecasted rain...and saves $225. 

Josiah's presence is felt everywhere! As we set up the tent, we remembered his help in year's past.  We remembered his claim that we needed TWO shade shelters - one for gear and one over the table. It rained this evening and I was so glad we have two shelters. 

This one had a broken pole which Michael fixed before putting it up. My man is handy to have around. The girls put up the big tent! 

Oops! I guess the rain shield IS important if we want to be ADDED protection to the tents inside. 

Various ones of us had tears at various times....sitting at the table, glancing at the tent and not seeing Josiah sitting outside of the tent in his chair was one of those times for me. 

I started a tradition of getting a little toy/gift for each child for each day of dip netting. The days are long and it helps to break them up. I pulled out bubbles for the boys tonight. 

"Magic Wands." 

Never a good sign - but these guys are HANDY! Have I said that before? 

CoRielle rented a cabin this year. It will be much easier than the tent with the ages of their kids...and they have a BATHROOM and a stove...and a SHOWER they won't have to wait in like for an hour to use! They also have a porch/balconty which goes all the way around their cabin. This evening Jenni, Stacia and Allie and I went over and sat on the balcony with  Arielle - and had our hot drinks. Priceless. 

Arielle and I

We decided we had pushed enough and would not go down to the beach tonight. We will go down tomorrow. Cory (with a bit of Michael's help) got all the gear ready and loaded into the truck. Everything is loaded and ready for a 7:30 start tomorrow morning.

CoRielle provided dinner tonight. Pulled pork sandwiches, chips, coleslaw and Keebler cookies. 

Danny helped Cory replace a tire on the wagon.

I heard singing, "Over the mountains and through the woods to Bachan's site we go!" and out popped Benny. 

KrUke arrived and agreed to the plan of putting their tent in the big tent. We hoped Jenni's tent would fit. I remembered it being a hiking tent and thought it would be fine. 

The boys were excited to help Jenni put her tent up in the other 1/3 of the big tent. Pretty soon we heard an excited exclamation, "It's LEETLE!" 

Charles, Danny & Jenni

It's Thursday night and that means knitting with Jenni. LOL  She tried out her train project and decided it is going to work well. 

Arielle came back to join us around the fire after Cory and the kids were in bed. Michael had foraged for wood for us...and it was a very nice fire - though it was about done before I thought to take a photo. 

Bunnies at 11:05 p.m. 

This year's site....

GRACE NOTES

• Being together

Unexpected Treasures (9 months)

Nine. 

Today held an unexpected treasure! Last night I received a text asking if I wanted to meet a friend before co-op. This was perfect timing. Laura and I met for quiche and tea at a little cafe down the road from co-op. We keep TALKING about doing this - it was good to actually do it. We did it with another co-op friend over a year ago. I can do better at connecting. 

Co-op was long and wild, but we got it done! LOL I haven't been buying much at all lately, but it's always good to spend time with this group. 

Nine months.

I had been home about 5 minutes when CoRielle showed up. They were coming to help us prep for Thursday. What great "kids" we have! Stacia was eating a bite and heading into Eagle River to spend the night with Josiah's girls so she can watch the girls tomorrow while Carrie is at work. We enjoyed a very brief conversation. Stacia has just moved her counseling to every other week! A great step for her. I had forgotten Allie worked 6:30 a.m. - 2:30 today.  She took over prepping a quick dinner for her and GG. 

Arielle cleaned the RV. Cory and Michael, and I emptied the longish chest freezer into the squarish check freezer so we can move the longish one into the RV for fish camp.  Cory and Michael began working on hooking up batteries and discovered they aren't charging...Michael ran out to try to find golf cart batteries that will fit. Cory grabbed the weed eater and trimmed up under the garden fence. 

Nine long months. 

Arielle and I chatted a bit with Allie and played with Ellie. What a precious smile. Check out the curl in the middle of her head! 

Bre called with promises of her famous cookie to take to Fish Camp. Danny fell and was nervous about coming into the house because Millie was upstairs. I went and got him...and enjoyed my Danny cuddles. They aren't as frequent as they used to be. 

📷by Danny

The boys informed me I had a LOT of peas in the garden. Translated: "Come on Bachan! Let's pick peas in the garden." We went out and they each picked quite a few....their 3 buckets probably equaled one bucket. 

I also picked some head lettuce. I have discovered I love having a crisp head of lettuce fresh from the garden. Allie already packed the peas in her lunch box.

Nine gut-wrenching months. 

I have been needing to cut back tomatoes. All my attention has been on paperwork since the 7th...and so...today I just went in and cut back everything that was green and leafy but had no tomatoes. I did the 3 big plants. I have 4 more I can trim after fish camp and 3 or 4 more than are even smaller. They look funny, and I may well have done it wrong, BUT I see tomatoes on those plants. 

I've got to figure out what to do with the pile of greenery. The chickens can't have them. I may dump them into the bed that is 1/2 filled with dirt...let them compost as it doesn't look like I'll be planting this year....well...maybe some more lettuce.....

We had six  helicals placed. IYKYK. Excitement will soon be coming our way. Flowers are starting to bloom...I hope they keep blooming while we are gone. 

This fireweed came up in a broken pot left by the previous owners 7 years ago. I let it grow in there as our own winter predictor. The legend says when the fireweed blooms to the top and then flames out...we have six weeks until winter. It hasn't reached the top yet. 

The awareness that nine months have passed since our life was upended ran through the day. Nine months. Unbelievable. 

GRACE NOTES: 

The day was filled with unexpected treasures...lunch with Laura, time in the garden with the boys, smiles from Ellie, a chat with both Bre and Arielle...

Considering the Dash (and more)

 "Victims for Justice is an independent non-profit working to ensure Alaskans affected by violent crime get the support they need and deserve..."  The memorial can be viewed at Hostetler Park in Anchorage at 3rd and L Street. 

Photo found online at Facebook 

One service Victims for Justice provides is an annual memorial service as well as a memorial with the names of those who were victims of homicide engraved on it. At the service each year all the names are read aloud. 

This was our first year to attend. Obviously, we expected it to be emotional. It was a BEAUTIFUL day. Many of our family gathered. 

Noah, Larissa, Stacia, Arielle, Jenni, Cory, Charles, Jared
Nolan, Jamin, Allie, Benny and Danny -several not pictured

Noah wore crocs in honor of Uncle Josiah. 

📷by Larissa

Our van arrived early, and we walked around the park in search of Josiah's name. I wasn't prepared for the impact of seeing his name engraved in stone...birth and death date. It's the first time I've seen it so permanent... it stung. 

A couple of people shared...names were read...I reflected while people spoke...tears rolled. It's still unbelievable our happy family life is now interwoven with words like murder, homicide, victim impact...

Josiah was so kind and gentle. He loved family, friends, and tenants. Dropped into any work situation - crew member to general manager at Chick Fil A, store manager at Walmart or community director at his last job - he would immediately build community. Before long there were BBQs, softball games and fishing trips. He was murdered at work. Work should be safe. He shouldn't be a victim of violent crime. It's not "right" or "ok" that Josiah is gone. I do believe that good can come from it, but no, it's not "good." 

I miss everything about Josiah. I miss his smile. I miss his BIG laugh. I miss his gigantic hugs. I miss his voice calling out, "Hey, y'all." I miss his unassuming wisdom. I miss hearing about his dreams and watching him plan and charge towards those dreams.  I miss him bouncing kids on the trampoline and leaning down from his great height to talk with a young nephew or niece. They loved to ride on uncle's shoulders. He loved us well. 

I heard the concept years ago that between birth and death is the dash...the dash represents all of life lived between the moment of birth and death. The poem, "Live Your Dash" by Linda Ellis, is not where I originally heard the concept to consider how I lived my "dash," but it captures the concept well.  When I looked at his precious name etched on a memorial to homicide victims, I immediately noted the dash. Thirty-four years.  It feels far too short. 

📷by Arielle

Josiah lived his "dash" well.  I find myself considering how I will fill the remainder of my dash. I'm doing much less than I have in years - by design.  I'm prayerfully evaluating the things I've given my time to in the past and the most important ways to be investing my time in the future.  However it ends up looking, I will attempt to fill my dash with the love, laughter and community Josiah displayed. 

I came away from this day knowing I need to focus prayer and energy towards the trial. Hearing the details of his murder and the defense for the taking of his life is going to take more grit than I currently possess. Pray for the grit of the Goeckers. 

Sunday was a busy day of church, Red Robin and Costco. Nolan walked in the door in time to discuss the political news with me - proving a liberal and a conservative CAN have an honest conversation while being polite and loving to each other.... just saying.  ::snort:: Nolan went on to play a game of cribbage with Stacia, while Allie slaved away on her summer class. By the end of the evening, she'd gotten this upcoming week's work done! She's getting ahead so she doesn't have to worry about school while at Fish Camp. She'll have 9 classes left before she can apply for her cohort! She's ticking them down. 

Today, I finally got all the paperwork I've been working on completed and faxed off. Now, we wait. Jamin came over and helped Michael work on changing the oil in the RV and other such RV prep things.  I threw together a quick dinner. He stayed for dinner and Jenni came and joined us.  When the conversation has been so wide-ranging no one but GG has pulled away from the table at 8:30 p.m. it's a good night. 

GRACE NOTES:

• Community resources to help us walk uncharted paths
• Leisurely conversation around the table with adult children 
• I am reading "Practicing the Way" and it's a breath of fresh air! 

Grands, Dip Netting Prep and Memories

It was my joy to hang out with Liv and Josi today!  This little gal is developing quite a personality! 

We did some chores, we visited, we ate, we played. 

Liv is QUICK at make bracelets...she's making a LOT of the just now. 

Our biggest accomplishment was keeping Josi awake until 6:50 p.m. Our goal was 7 p.m. She's slept through the night the last two nights if she goes down at 7. It took both of us to do it! 

I certainly look sleepier than Josi. 

While I was away, Michael was busy with CoRielle. It was probably good I wasn't around as I burst into tears and had a mini "session" in the driveway when I saw the dipnets all lined up. This shelf broke last week. I know Michael was happy to have Cory stop by to help today. They rebuilt the shelf, and we now have power in the RV again. 

📷by Arielle 

I'm not sure what they're doing, but I do think Benny and Charle's haircuts are adorable. Today marks one year since Charles' adoption...how fun it is not to put smiley faces over his face. 

📷by Arielle 

📷by Arielle 

The nets are repaired and ready to go. It's time for me to make time for a Costco run and to outfit the RV... and clear out a freezer to take with us. We've already determined this year is more about "getting through the first," being together and remembering and honoring Josiah, than it is about fish. None of us are going for our limit this year. I envision much more time simply being together.  

As we prep, I can't help remembering Josiah in the midst of all the prep, driving, set up, arranging parking, schlepping coolers of fish and gear up and down the beach...and this iconic photo from last year. We would not have made it through this year without our relationships with Jesus. We just wouldn't have. I suppose we would have - but I sure wouldn't have wanted to. 

GRACE NOTES
A day with Livie and Josi. 

CoRielle's help with prep. 

Late night talk on the deck with Michael. 

When a Spreadsheet Makes You Cry

I have been slow to plan dipnetting this year. The reservation was made before we left camp last year, but by this time I have usually updated the spreadsheet. This spreadsheet contains a list of everyone coming, when they arrive and leave, where they will be sleeping, and which meal they will be providing.  From this I shop for groceries and snacks, prep the RV, and clear out the small freezer and move it to the RV. While I do this Mike, and Josiah, usually repair nets, check all the equipment and do essential guy stuff. 

It's true I have been busy with a ton of paperwork in the past weeks. It's also true it's been raining. We simply haven't embraced the planning with our usual gusto.

Arielle and the kids came over today with the express purpose of helping me prepare for dipnetting. We pulled up the 2023 spreadsheet to update for 2024. Staring me in the face was a reminder of joy and sorrow. I had to remove Josiah's name. I cried. The hallmark of 2024 are moments of joy graced with grief. We are so blessed to have loved this boy/man. We are blessed to be Josiah's parents. It does slap one in the face from time to time and hurts in this season. 

I now have a clear picture of who is coming, what I need to buy and what I need to prep.  Unfortunately, I will be screaming busy until Monday, but I will be ready to execute the plan come Monday. We leave to dipnet on Thursday. 

This will be Josi and Ellie's first year at fish camp. 

Ellie Rae 

Benny ate strawberries to his heart's content and then picked a few to take home.

GRACE NOTES 

SWEET extra hours of solitude with Jesus this morning.

Fun visit with Arielle and kids.

Dinner and an episode with Jenni.