Shopping for a Mother of the Bride Dress

I am shopping for a dress to wear to BreAnne's wedding. 

No, I did not procrastinate.


BreAnne and I went shopping and I bought a dress Bre likes. It looks darling on her. It's a bit too form fitting for me to feel comfortable wearing it walking down an aisle with so many eyes on me. It's beautiful and I'll wear it when I lose 10 lbs.

I found a second dress and Bre liked it too. I have it and it's sweet. I had plenty of time for it to arrive from the UK. It fits great. I plan to have Krista remove the bow. I have shoes to match.

So - WHY am I shopping for a dress 12 days before the wedding?

I misunderstood. I thought ALL the grandmothers and moms would be in red. It turns out they are all wearing pink.  Imagine, if you will, stately, serene music and Michael's Mom walking in, my Mom walking in, maybe Izaak's grandmother, Izaak's Mom - all in shades of pink. I step into the doorway in RED and the music switches to James Brown...."I Feel Good...."  OK it's a fun scenario, but I feel pretty sure it would draw attention to me - and I want the attention on BreAnne and Izaak. ::snort::

The solution is for me to find a dress in some shade of pink...not too formal...the bridesmaids dresses are about the length of the one above....BUT I don't want to look like a teeny bopper either.....Marysville and Yuba City didn't have great options.

After church the girls and I headed to the big town of Roseville. Three u-turns, a surprise trip to Sacramento, zillions of stores later and we're home with two vests for the boys, shoes for Stacia and NO DRESS for me. ::snort:: We DID have fun. Here are some glimpses.

Kohls

I don't think so

 I liked the one in front - but they didn't have my size! You don't want to see the photo of me squeezed into this one. 

My word! 

From the Bohemian spot....thought maybe the pink drape would work - but well - I felt like an aging hippie with a pink drape. 

This tan under-dress thing is all the rage this season evidently. I got desperate enough to try, hoping it wouldn't like like what I thought it would. Stacia settled it, "Mom it looks like your skin!" OK. 

Can you tell how BAD this dress is? That's see through....and the back was totally see through...and 1/2 the front of the skirt was missing. I asked about a 50% discount as at least have the dress was missing. ::snort:: As we walked out I was SHOCKED to see a Mom BUYING this for her teen daughter. WHAT IS SHE THINKING?????

Nordstroms, Kohls, Macy, Pennies, Sears, Bohemian Chic, and numerous boutiques. I'm not sure where to try next. I found one online but what if it doesn't fit????

Choosing Joy!
©2013 D.R.G.
~Coram Deo~
Living all of life before the face of God...

What About The Sheep and Goats (Hospitality)

 I stalled in Matthew 25. I've spent more time pondering, thinking and journaling. 

via google images

What about THE.sheep.and.goats? I wrestled with this Saturday and Sunday and this morning again. I couldn't move on quite yet.  I don't like the picture of Jesus sending some to inherit His kingdom (25:34); others to eternal fire (25:41).

I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink; I was a stranger and you invited me in; naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me; I was in prison and you came to me (25:35-35)

....To the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of mine, even the least of them, you did it to me. (25:40) 

I get the big point of Jesus being fully capable of separating the sheep and the goats at the end of time. I get that He WILL do this. I know the main point of this passage is that I don't have to do this - He will. 

But HOSPITALITY screamed at me in this passage. This passage displays the strength, beauty and importance of Biblical Hospitality. 

I thought I had written out my notes on the study of Hospitality I did in the summer of 2011. Evidently, I didn't. I led a workshop at a conference and have spoken to a couple of women's groups - but never blogged it.   Humph...I can't just link. ::snort:: 

I cannot possibly share all my convictions this a.m. but this is what  I wrote in 2011, "look at the CONTEXT of where we find the word in the New Testament. Hospitality is a basic virtue of the Christian life (Rm 12:13). Hospitality is a qualification of church leaders (listed before teaching) and older women (I Tim 3:2, Titus 1:8). Hospitality is a practice we are to cultivate as we prepare for the end times (I Peter 4:9). Answering the question of WHY it's a basic of Christian life, a leadership qualification and preparation for the end times leads to the formation of a Biblical Theology of Hospitality."

The Greek word translated "Hospitality" is Philoxenos (Strongs 5283). It means LOVING STRANGERS...taking care of the needs of STRANGERS.

It's what God did for US. He sought out strangers, met our needs, loved us, invited us into His family and saved us in the process.  I'm convinced Biblical Hospitality is crucial to evangelism - to fulfilling the Great Commission,  to authentic community, and  to discipleship.

We've redefined "hospitality" to mean doughnuts or cookies after a service, a monthly potluck, inviting friends into our home.....what we term hospitality is most often Christian fellowship. We are called to fellowship. But we are also called to meet the needs of STRANGERS. (This is fairly easy when you are new to a location and everyone is a stranger. LOL).

Hospitality may involve inviting others into your home. OR it  may look more like greeting the newcomer at Bible study, showing a new mom where the changing table is at the church, giving food to the beggar at the corner, taking clothes to the girls rescued from sex trafficking, than dinner and games at my house on Friday night or opening my home for a small group. Again - we ARE called to Christian fellowship.

Read the verses again - these believers are being rewarded because they've met the needs of strangers with which they've intersected. That's Biblical Hospitality.  In doing so, they did it for Jesus.

Biblical Hospitality is important. But - important enough to go to hell if you miss it? WHAT!!!!  Stay with me. I've pondered this.

via google images

Jesus won't send one to hell because they didn't practice hospitality or  didn't do the right works. A man is sent to hell because of his heart - did he believe (which involves following and action in the Greek definition)? Those who did not practice hospitality are goats.

Sheep follow their shepherd. Jesus met the needs of strangers. If we believe Jesus, we will  follow Jesus, we will imitate him. We will  begin to meet the needs of strangers.  These men did not follow Jesus into the world.  In this passage, actions simply reveal  their heart; their very nature/species.

We will act and look like Jesus in our circles of influence, not out of compulsion but out of gratitude! Like Isaiah in Isaiah 6, we recognize the great mercy and grace given to us. We see our desperate, sinful condition and we are undone. We mourn our messiness. BUT... God cleanses and purifies our mess.  Out of our deep humility and gratitude, we see the need around us and  the love of Christ compels us to respond.  "Here I am - send me."  I will go. I will be used to meet others in their mess with the love of Jesus. I will live as  a sheep following my Shepherd (John 10).

Yes, there will be a great reward for practicing Biblical Hospitality....and God doesn't label a man a goat and send him hell for not passing out enough blankets...our actions do reveal our hearts.

And BTW I STILL don't like the picture of some being sent to eternal fire - which I am convicted must motivate me to love more courageously in the future.

Choosing Joy!
©2013 D.R.G.
~Coram Deo~
Living all of life before the face of God...

Our Wedding Prep

It seems fitting that my SOAP of the day was Matthew 25 and I researched well-prepared bridesmaids. We spent much of this day preparing for "The Wedding." 

Michael and I had a good morning talk.

Triple Rose

Arielle and Nolan had Japanese lessons. Kim told Nolan to remind me that we used to butter our hands to pull taffy. Ryu and Nolan had a good laugh. Um...that is right!

Krista called and we had a great talk with  her.

My sister-friend, Beth, called and it was fantastic to hear her voice.

Michael and the boys went to replace spark plugs.

The girls and I tackled the candy project. We were armed with helpful tips from readers....cold water, gloves, and the butter trick.  We set up an assembly line and got a routine working well. Stacia unwrapped all these little candy canes for us.

Arielle filled them....she and I both squished the warm canes into hearts....I liked buttering my fingers....really fun for a vegan to be able to enjoy the butter flavor when the project was over. ::snort:: 

We used all the sticks BreAnne had sent  and needed  more. I went for "the box."  Over New Years Krista came in from the garage and commented she saw the box on the shelves, opened it up, and it was like she'd found a "piece of her childhood." I was GLAD I'd kept the box when we left Japan.  This box entered our home one year when the older four were young and we were assistant pastors in Hardin, MT.  One year a rancher graced us with this lovely box - full of  beef. I kept the box - long after the beef was gone. It always reminded me of the family who blessed us  and of God's provision through His body.  I filled it with candy molds and supplies. It's moved with us through these past 18 1/2 years of military moves... to Japan and back.  There aren't many things that say "childhood" to a military family - things change so often....but to me this box always takes me back to that time. It was fun when Krista voiced the same thoughts. Maybe I won't ditch it in our great downsize. LOL Today I pulled it out to get some supplies to finish a project for BreAnne's wedding - she was about 8 when "the box" entered our home.

We finished making these little hearts - some are marked with seared flesh and Arielle is sure a few have our fingerprints on them. ::snort:: Michael came in to say they were taking the van to get the oil changed. We needed to buy ribbon and more bags to wrap these.....so we all went shopping.

These two will be ushers with their older brothers at "The Wedding." We picked up pants, dress shirts and these ties. We couldn't find vests or shoes.

We got tights for the girls.

We couldn't find shoes for Stacia.

We obviously need to get the boys in for hair cuts before we leave. I think I can trim up the girls and I.

Though we ALL tried to avoid it - I'll have to all of them with me on a mall trip before we leave for "The Wedding." The boys think a mall trip is a fate worse than death and I think trying to find camis and "such" with the three younger ones in tow is a fate worse than death and more death!!!

We managed to get two weeks of our core subjects done last week. We are working to do this same this week. It will be a full week.

Dinner is over. Michael is polishing up tomorrow's sermon. The kids and I are going to watch an episode of Duck Dynasty....

Choosing Joy!
©2013 D.R.G.
~Coram Deo~
Living all of life before the face of God...

Be Alert - Responsible Bridesmaids

"Be on the alert then, for you do not know the day nor the hour." Matthew 25:13

funkandjazz via photopin cc

BLUF (Bottom Line Up Front) - I am to cultivate an alert spirit rather than a sleepy sluggish spirit (I Cor 16:13, Col 4:2, I Thess 5:6, I Peter 5:8, Rev 3:2,3; 16:15 to start).

Matthew 25:1-30 challenges believers to remain ALERT, prepared, watchful and ready for Jesus to return - even in times of rest! 

"Be on the alert" is the translation of the Greek word Gregarius (Strongs 1127). It means to refrain from sleep, to be watchful, to be mindful of threats, and involves the duty of vigilance combined with prayer in regard to the arrival to Jesus, a crisis, or as preparation for impending temptation. 

As Dr. Zodhiates states in the Complete Word Study Dictionary of the New Testament, a "christian is alert or vigilant in order to defend himself against a spiritual foe. He is properly prepared for any surprise or sudden change in his circumstances, and above all, in order that his fellowship with God in prayer may be undistracted and efficacious." 

Even in times of God-ordained rest we are to remain alert.

Background - because I'm fascinated by weddings just now.....and background is fun....let's walk through the first 30 verses - quickly.

25:1

•  It was an honor to be selected as a bridesmaid
• Torches for a wedding procession were NOT the small oil lamps we picture
• Torches were sticks wrapped in  oil soaked rags
• Rags would burn 15 min or longer and then need to be rekindled
• With proper refill containers the torches could burn several hours

via geoffwhite.com 

25:2 - 7

• Wedding feasts were held at night after a day of dancing
• Bridesmaids were with the bride during the day
• It was o.k. for Bridesmaids to be resting with the Bride
• Bridesmaids would leave the bride, go meet the groom and escort him to the bride
• If the groom was later than anticipated the lamps would need an extra reserve of oil
• Grooms were often late and were repeatedly announced until they arrived

25:8

• Bridesmaids were expected to have sufficient oil to keep their torch lit in the procession to the groom's home and for dancing

25:9-10

• Sharing the oil would leave to little oil for any of the lamps - it would ruin the wedding ceremony
• It is difficult to find oil dealers at night
• Bridesmaids were supposed to meet the groom, go fetch the bride and lead the procession back to the Groom's Father's home where the wedding feast would be conducted

  

  Via nbcnews.com 

25:11 - 13

• These foolish bridesmaids missed the entire procession, the singing and the dancing
• They missed the critical moment when the bride was brought under the wedding canopy
• They did not do what they were expected to do and they were not admitted to the wedding feast when they finally arrived.  
• Wedding feasts lasted 7 days following the ceremony

The Holy Spirit is sure to speak various things to each of us through this parable. A few take aways I had:

• Each of us is responsible to be PERSONALLY prepared for Jesus' return 
• Can't rely on the preparation of others - I must be prepared - spiritual formation/discipline/discipleship matters
• It is my responsibly to be alert, watchful, mindful and ready to follow Jesus when He returns

25:14 - 30 - Parable of the Talents (currency - Master's Possessions)

• Two servants were faithful and alert to properly steward the master's possessions
• One servant had a misconception of His master which led him to laziness and bad stewardship (24-25)
• God wants me to be alert and fruitful - as we are faithful He will entrust us with more responsibility (29)

God has given each of us spiritual gifts and possessions which we are to use to invest in His kingdom....to be fruitful for Jesus.  He calls us to seasons of rest - but He also calls us to seasons of service. I have been in a season of rest  and sense it may be time to move from rest to more intentional service.  I have enjoyed a season of rest-producing-strength-deeper intimacy. I  have been listening for God to say, "Move." I begin to wonder if  lingering another year in this spot will be transitioning to sluggishness. I wonder how to carry the lessons of rest, solitude, margin, intimacy into another season of service. 

It is enough, for today, to be alert, mindful, watchful, listening - He will instruct. 

Choosing Joy!
©2014 D.R.G.
~Coram Deo~
Living all of life before the face of God...

Act of Love or Wedding Prep

Anna and Elsa have nothing over the Gherkins act of  love for the soon-to-be-wed-Gherkin in Oregon (BreAnne).

I always suspected it. I resisted for as long as I could. I joined that innocent little obsession so many sing praises about - Pinterest. Yep - Pinterest is pure EVIL for those of us who are not crafty or don't have 30 hours to make a little craft look perfect for a post.

We volunteered to make little candies for "The Wedding."  How hard could it be? Looks easy peasy on Pinterest. All the comments say how easy they are to make - and how CUTE.

Stick the candy canes into a 300* oven for 3 min.

Pull them out and "gently squish them with your fingers."

Fill with white chocolate and sprinkles.....

We've got this! Stacia got started unwrapping 300 mini-candy canes.....Arielle and I melted chocolate and lined pans with parchment paper.

We had high hopes! Millions on Pinterest sing the praises of this little craft - alright, allow me and my scorched fingers a bit of hyperbole! 

What could go wrong????? 

Just this - have YOU ever tried to gently squish melty, hot, sugar with YOUR fingers??????

Some of the charm of THIS project wore off after the first batch.....Arielle tried spoons and tongs to squish the candy canes and they just don't look like pretty hearts unless you squish them with your fingers.

My theory is a touch of seared flesh transfers a hint of love to them.

It took us three pans to realize we'd have to use our fingers, cut the time in the oven to two minutes and WORK FAST....it also became clear *I* would be the one squishing all these candies.... ME...the one who doesn't EAT processed sugar...We did discover I am  able to sing, "Ouch, ouch, ouch" in many different octaves.

I maintain our making of these is as true an act of love as Anna's for Elsa.

We've finished 25. They'll be fine when we tie a cute ribbon around them, wrap them....

Seriously, we are thrilled to be working on wedding projects...and I figure my blistered fingers will heal before 14 Feb.....we have many more to make...on another day. Maybe I'll trick invite some local ladies to a candy making party.

 There MUST be a way to do this without using fingers...my fingers really are sore. No-one else mentioned this problem. 

Choosing Joy!
©2014 D.R.G.
~Coram Deo~
Living all of life before the face of God...

Endure to the End

"But the one who endures to the end; he will be saved." Matthew 24:13

The context of this verse is the end times. Yes, I spent a significant amount of time outlining Ch. 24 and 25. I made a couple of lists. I noted the key points. I studied the logos (written word).

However, verse 13 was a rhema word (light bulb word for the moment) for me today.  Holy Spirit had impressed on me, as I read through the NT in November and December, my personal focus for the year is endurance. I will camp on this focus when it is revealed in Scripture throughout the year.

The one who ENDURES to the END will be SAVED.

The one who keeps going, stays in the pool, stays in the fight, keeps standing in the storm, dances in the rain, bears up under the pressure - THAT one will be saved.

The one who endures not just this storm, this incident, this day....the one who endures all the way to the END...the completion, the finish line. In context this could be speaking to the end of the persecution or the end of a life....in any event God wants me to be a person who stands in the storm, dances in the rain, all the way to the END.When the dance has quit being fun and is a grueling test; He still calls me to ENDURE...to dance in the rain; stand in the storm. 

THIS enduring, standing, finishing person will be SAVED.  The word soso/sozo, translated saved, means:

•  delivered
•  made whole
•  preserved safe from danger, loss, and destruction
• preserved from physical death
• preserved from spiritual death

Context is used to determine the meaning of the word. In this context, I think any of the above "could" apply, though most commentators lean towards salvation from spiritual death. I rejoice that I have been saved from the penalty of sin, am being saved from the power of sin, and will one day be saved from even the presence of sin!

There are many areas in my life which are works in progress. God, through this verse, challenges me to ENDURE to the END, trusting Him for deliverance, wholeness, safety, SALVATION. God will finish the work He has begun. I cooperate with Him when I  endure, by grace.

Choosing Joy!
©2014 D.R.G.
~Coram Deo~
Living all of life before the face of God...

Portrait of a Hypocrite

via google images

I spent some time in Matthew 23 this morning and found some wonderfully random tidbits I've never fully realized before....and some I had. 

Hypocrisy - two-faced; actor; counterfeit; one whose behavior differs from their beliefs or one who varies their behavior based on where they are....

A hypocrite. We all disdain them. These folks are the opposite of believers - a believer produces actions consistent with their stated beliefs (see Greek meaning of believe).

The ugly truth is even the most vocal anti-hypocrite may well find themselves in the list below. It's easy to condemn hypocrisy, but if we neglect our secret life with God, we may end up a hypocrite. Outwardly appealing; inwardly dead.

For your reading pleasure....a portrait of a hypocrite. If you desire to be a hypocrite:

• Don't practice what you preach (23:3)
• Value public recognition over a secret life (Matthew 6) or servant leadership (23:5-12)
• Shut the doors to the Kingdom from seekers (23:13)
• Perfect long, showy prayers (23:14)
• Neglect and exploit the vulnerable (23:14)
• Make converts and teach them your false teaching (23:15)
• Be a blind guide (23:16,17,19,24)
• Rather than obey God's clear teaching - make up your own standard to "get around Him"  (23:16-22)
• Tithe but neglect justice, mercy and faith (Hebrews 11:6)
• Focus on details and miss the main point (23:24)
• Clean up the outside and fill the inside with trash (23:25-27)

It is essential we allow God to search our hearts. To reveal the darkness, to clean up the trash and bring life to the dead areas. If not, we're left with a "religion" and may well be on our way to becoming that which we disdain. 

"Fun Random thoughts from Matthew 23"

Via google images

Gnat thing - Pharisees desired to obey God's commands - they really did. They wanted to avoid uncleanness...and in an attempt to legislate purity; they came up with a lot of rules to help them be righteous (which never really works - it's all about relationship with Jesus). ANYWAY - one of the rules concerned INSECTS in their beverages. Think about it. Ewww....So if anything bigger than a lentil (say a fly) landed in your drink, you needed to strain it. Gnats were smaller. If a gnat was in your drink you were allowed to drink it without straining it.   Ewww! Jesus masterfully uses hyperbole in this passage. These guys were careful. They were deliberate. They went above and beyond even the law of most Pharisees. In their attention to details however, they missed the camel in the cup! A CAMEL - the biggest animal in Palestine and certainly unclean. Silly Pharisees. Um -  I do this too. 

Swearing - If you get lost in all that swearing by thrones and offerings and temples, here's the bottom line: God said not to swear by His name. These were all attempts to get around God's command without  paying the consequences.  This doesn't work - ever. If God said it; He means it. Do you ever try to get around God and yet avoid the stated consequences?  Um - I  do this from time to time too. 

Vipers - (no photo - I'm forever scarred by having searched for one- I.Hate.Snakes.and.Lizards.too) A viper is a poisonous snake. We all probably know this. A "brood of vipers" - well a whole lotta snakes. Right? That's what I've always thought. Today I decided to look up "brood" in a Bible dictionary. The word means generations or offspring.  O.K. Jesus is telling them they are "sons of vipers"....um....well now...not especially "nice"....a bit of tough love on display. I dug deeper....vipers were said to have EATEN their way out of their pregnant mother's stomachs. My word. They were guilty of matricide. The killing of their mothers. Yikes...they were lower than a snake.... Have I ever turned on a spiritual parent?

Yep - those nasty Pharisees are a perfect portrait of Hypocrisy. If I'm not diligent to walk with Jesus, if I neglect a secret life with Jesus (Matthew 6), if I get more concerned about the outside look, than I am about my heart - guess what?  The portrait of hypocrisy becomes

There but for the marvelous GRACE of God go I. 

I dare not cast stones. 

Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there be any hurtful/wicked/ way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way. Psalm 139:23-24

Choosing Joy!
©2014 D.R.G.
~Coram Deo~
Living all of life before the face of God...