Friendship in Proverbs 20

First, a thought. When approaching any study of Scripture we need to keep an open heart to change required in our lives. If studying the Word doesn't cause me to know God deeper, to be transformed a bit more into Christ's image...then it's simply an intellectual exercise. I do not believe that is what God had in mind when He told us to meditate on his word, to look into the perfect law of liberty....

In studying what to look for in friends I've become acutely aware of the type of friend I need to be to others....and I've been challenged and convicted and changed.

20:3 - Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man, But any fool will quarrel."

I need to beware of being quarrelsome. This is difficult for a talker...and I've often had to apologize to my family, to my friends in real life, on SHS and probably even on this blog. I try.

I need to beware of quarrelsome friends. The Word says they are foolish.

20:7 - A righteous man who walks in his integrity - how blessed are his sons after him.

I will look for righteous friends who walk with integrity - and I will continue to strive to walk in integrity....and to daily throw myself on His grace which allows me to be clothed in His righteousness.

20:19 He who goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets, therefore do not associate with a gossip.

Youch - this one appears clear.....but I DO have questions. What exactly does the Word mean when it says slander? Is it different than what our culture considers to be slander? What about secrets? What about associating? Does this mean NO FELLOWSHIP? How can I be salt and light to a friend who struggles with these sins if I have nothing to do with them? Does the word associate maybe mean a deep friendship and a mentoring or acquaintance type friendship would be ok? Remembering that Proverbs is not a doctrinal book but a book of wise maxims, I know that this may not be a COMMAND that I HAVE to follow but rather a wise principle that a wise person would follow? It certainly is for my GOOD to avoid someone who slanders, gossips and reveals secrets of others. Yes - I need to do more study. I've begun word studies and will share more on this as I flesh it all out. If you've prayed about this or studied this verse and have some insights you'd like to share - feel free to comment.

*Yep, I decided to just jump in and not try to "catch up" from the first.

Friendship in Proverbs

I'm doing it again! I love to read through the book of proverbs month by month. I often look for one word or one theme and mark it, take notes etc. Any verse can speak to me, but I find that looking for a specific theme does help me to keep my mind from wandering.

For general background info on Proverbs you can read this post, which contains thoughts I shared when beginning to study "Parenting in Proverbs".

I'm going to be leading a six week study on Friendship starting 4 Sept. I've been doing a lot of thinking and thought I'd share. I have a heart for relationships and found that I really NEEDED this focus in my personal life.....maybe someone else will appreciate it too. A people person sometimes struggles to find a balance in relationships. Are friendships expected to be forever? What do you do if a friendship seems to dissolve? How do you make friends when those around seem not to need new friends? How do you know when it is safe to share your heart? What should I look for in friendships? Are there different levels or types of friendships? These are things I've been pondering and I am curious to see what Proverbs (that book of wisdom) has to say on the topic.

Again this will be devotional - I'm not not looking for an in-depth topical study at this point. I reserve the right to dig into a specific verse at any time. ::snort:: I use the New American Standard Bible, published by The Lockman Foundation, in my devotional reading.

I only need to figure out if I should go back and try to catch up or just begin posting from here....stay tuned....I simply want to set some framework for daily posts you may begin to shortly see..... (no cutesy friendship graphic - maybe I'll have to go surfing soon. )::snort::

More of Monday

Quote of the Day: Jared rushed in "I think we're out of synch". Mike rushed in "Where have YOU been?" Seems they both went out side to go on a run and missed each other. ::snort::

We agreed to walk down to "the Mar" after "dinner" (and I use that term LOOSELY - check comments for more on that because I don't have to totally diss myself on my blog ::snort::). The Mar is a local school. Fun playgrounds.

Michael and I began our rolling budget talk at the playground. He was happy to see the pages of numbers. I suspected he would be. In all SERIOUSNESS he told me a couple of weeks ago that he thought I should enroll in an accounting class....ugh....We shall see.

We met our neighbors at the playground. Played with some local kids. Got to talk with Shanna and see Stephanie's kids too on our way home. Happy Anniversary, Stephanie!

Michael and Jared attempted to go out for a run...so I got some blogging time. They are currently on a "cool down" run from their separate but together run....

In a strange, ongoing story I received a cell phone in the mail today from the Oak Harbor post office. Krista - is THIS your cell phone? The battery is dead and we don't have a charger. Email me with a list of the other things that were in the package you sent.

Christmas Ticker

I honestly was NOT going to start counting down until after Thanksgiving this year. Honest. I don't want to subject all to those hourly/minute by minute count downs of the first year the girls came home.....

Of course last year we all tracked the girls from closed bus station to bus station.

THIS year I planned to be dignified. I'd put up a ticker the day after Thanksgiving. No fan fare - just a dignified ticker.

BUT....we are EXCITED!!!! Only 4 months until we get to see our babies...and Nicholas...and Mom and Dad TOO!!!!

Arielle asked me how many more days and THEN SHE asked me if we could make a ticker. I said, "don't you think it may be a little early." She smiled real BIG and said, "not really"...and that's all it took for me to lose my dignity once again.

Mom - email the time you'll be arriving here and I'll see if you are going to be on the same flight again.... don't post the name of the town or time here....just in case I really DO have a 500 lbs blog stalker....

Blog Awards

A weighty topic? I didn't begin blogging, as some do, to change the world, share my thoughts with a large audience, promote a business or ministry... I began blogging because we wanted an easy way to keep in touch with friends and family and my memory has failed to the point that a family journal is a necessity. This explains why my blog is full of the long "this is what we did today" posts.

Over time, with help from others, I've come to see that the blog has become an extension of my mentoring lifestyle. I'm blown away that so many read and are blessed. All the honor and glory belongs with God and not me...And so when awards come my way I'm never quite sure what to do with them....I guess I want to say "thank you", "I'm humbled" and "I think the right thing to do is simply wrap it all up and hand it back to God".

If you never read any of the reflective posts and only read the fun stuff...that's fine too.....maybe I'll win a "totally silly" award someday. LOL Thanks to Michelle for giving me the Blogger Reflection Award. I'm humbled at the way that God uses a simple blog and an even simpler blog author. ::snort:: I know protocol says to post the nice things said - but I simply can't. If you want to read the nice things Michelle said, visit her blog. I've tried to track down the originator of this award to figure out WHAT I'm supposed to do and HOW the rules work - but I haven't succeeded. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to post blogs that are reflective and make me think or blogs that reflect the Master....So....I'm not going to do anything yet.

1. Well I am going to nominate a reflective blog that I'm aware of....the award goes to TIM at Duckabush blog. Now Kathy is a profound blogger with wonderful photos - but she's won her share of awards. ::snort:: I began reading this family's blog back when Tim was the SOLE blog author...and I've always loved his perspective on hikes, parenting, being an upright child of God....and since Kathy's posts minister to me me too I guess I can give her this award too so that would mean that I DID nominate two....that's not too shabby. LOL

Thanks, Trish, for passing this award on. Trish thinks I'm nice - and she's lived IRL with me through weight loss, weight gain, making a zillion tea pots for a mother's day tea, pms, planning for women's things, et al. BTW Trish I can't get anything to copy from your blog (graphic, link properties, text). I would have picked Trish for this award...but she's done been picked! LOL

"This award is for those bloggers who are nice people, good blog friends, and those who inspire good feelings and inspiration. Also, for those who are a positive influence on our blogging world. Once you've been awarded please pass it on to seven others who you feel are derving of this award. " In no particular order...here are 7 (if I can do it). BTW I'm trying to pick blogs I've not picked before and I think ALL of you are nice or I wouldn't read you! LOL

1. My friend Deja (Life in Texas) is nice. She simply is. She's the one who gave me permission to grieve the loss of our babies. She's the one who made zillions of phone calls to co-op for me. She's the one who watched Shannon's children and took clothes to Shannon in the ER. She's nice. If she wants her blog URL posted, I'll post it later....but she certainly wins this award in my book. Feel free to copy the award into your blog, if you'd like, Deja.

2. Lisa at The Berry Patch is my next pick. She has always been incredibly encouraging on SHS, on CWLS, on blogs. She's nice.

3. Dody is a friend I've known IRL, on SHS, on TOG Loose Threads....a few years ago she sent me her TOG when I couldn't figure out why everyone thought it was great and I should switch curriculums, she's a gracious host and friend. You'll love her Alaskan photos. Dody is a fellow military spouse.

4. I have to pick my friend Becky at One Little Blogspot.....I'll post her URL later if she doesn't mind going public.

5. Liz...well, well, well... Liz has an amazing gift of combining humor and sarcasm to cope with life. There have been days when a comment from her has been used mightily by God to pull me out of the pits. Liz is also a very dedicated student of the Word, and has walked through the valley with her faith and trust intact. If you casually read her blog you may not think she is "nice", ::snort:: but she's been a cyber friend for years and I'm here to tell you the big secret is SHE IS NICE (as long as you don't mess with her chocolate). ::snort::

6. Chris at A Piece of Pax.....This lady has homeschooled 3 successful children, she's been host mom to reams of Master's Commission children, she offers science advice and news links on SHS (though she could have dropped us when her baby graduated), she runs a great used book business, takes care of her parents (who don't live with her) and her mother in law (who does live with her) and she has 4 darling grandchildren.

7. All those who read and post comments on my blog - are certainly nice - and so I award you all. LOL

Monday Madness

Curves. I fear the potluck and CHINESE food yesterday were NOT good things at all for my weight loss. ::snort::

Oops - forgot we had to run to the ER. This time they DID remove Jamin's stitches. This is all that is left of his accident.

Since the children were little I've had a habit of taking them to DQ after every dentist visit, shot, or ER accident......Jamin has been the recipient of most of the DQ trips as he's had most the stitches etc. I think because he moves so fast - always has. ANYWAY he asked about going to a coffee house instead of DQ - so we did. We shared a bagel and he had a brownie too. It was a good time for he and I to visit without the other noises that distract us......

I spent the rest of the day with math!!!! NUMBERS!!!! I paid bills. First I had to check the register with the online register.... We're in a bit of a budget crunch - not a crisis - but a crunch. We were on step 4 and we're back at somewhere between step 1 - 3. Basically, we've had to use our emergency fund and need to build it back up. I project we can be back at step 4 by January. It's time to get the plan on PAPER and stick to it. LOL

I went to the shelf and pulled Ramsey and Burkett out. I typed up the baby steps and will post them where all can learn them (good for our young men anyway). I then typed up all our expenses and surprise, surprise we have more income than expense....so we must need to simply track and fine tune.....THEN I typed up sample budgets using Ramsey and then Burkett's percentages and Michael's income. Tonight we'll begin to compare what we've been doing with what is recommended. All those numbers! LOL

Yes, we HAVE lived on a budget for years and years - over 16. We've been debt free for over 12 years. The problem is that every time we move, we need to tweak the budget....and with this move we haven't.....and we've had new variables to factor in....children driving, children moving out, new eating plans etc.

I've had my nose in the numbers and not fixed dinner...gotta run...but I knew this would be IT for blogging tonight....too many important things to discuss. LOL

And as I leave...Stacia has discovered the kitty costume!

Now what AM I going to make for dinner..........

Manic Sunday - oh wait that's a "M" - Scampering Sunday

I spent a few moments reading email this a.m. I was online to check on some details for plane tickets we've bought for Michael's parents.

The traditional service is at 1100. Good service, first opportunity to hear our new Chaplain. 1220 found us trying to come up with a spot that would be good and tasty for lunch.

We opted for a Chinese Buffet. We have had a terrible time down here finding a Chinese restaurant that serves kid-friendly food as well. In AK all the Chinese and Mexican places served hamburgers and chicken strips too. This ONE spot in town, Bamboo Gardens, will cook fries and hamburgers for us.....but it takes a solid 25 minutes for them to do so. We rushed in, told them what we needed, sent the older ones through the buffet.....and THEN they came back and told us they were out of hamburger buns. Michael and I had to be back to the chapel by 1330. We moved to plan B - the older members of our family quickly pigged out on Chinese - got our yearly MSG quota taken care of. THEN Josiah went through a drive through for burgers and fries - while Mike and I dropped the rest of the kids at home and raced for the base.

1400 - Gospel Service. 1530 - pot luck. Stuffed.

Mike and I spent an hour or so in his office....then at 1730 headed back to the chapel for the New Life Contemporary service. The worship team sounded AWESOME - we have a revolving worship team as the students are here for 6 weeks - 9 months I think.

Back home Michael and Jared headed out to run off Chinese and potluck. I'm drained and should go pay bills and look at the budget for school....but I'm not.

I booked three tickets yesterday for the girls and Nicholas to come home for Christmas.....the fabulous four wanted to watch Elf....and you know what? I'm getting EXCITED! Christmas is coming and our home will be full for a couple of weeks.....My parents will be here too! Only 4 more months till I can hug my babies necks again!