Monday, November 16, 2015

Blogging and Parkinson's

Some may have noticed blogging has slowed down. I recently received this note from a dear saint who has journeyed a couple more decades than I....has experienced joys and grief I've not had to experience....wise words. I listened.

"Unless it is therapeutic for you, do not feel like you have to blog daily. Sometimes the burden and grief of unfulfilled longings can just be too much to express. I was thinking this and praying for you when I was awake for part of the night again."

How precious is it that God put me on her mind? How cool she took the time to reach out and share a word of wisdom and comfort?

When we were busy with the bustle of moving from our home to the trailer, when we were traveling the Pacific Northwest and exploring new areas, it was easy to ignore Parkinson's - this thing which invaded our lives.   Last week Michael and Nolan zipped to Alaska (love those airline points) to meet with the great DMV in the north...and I was alone with the kids and my thoughts in the trailer.

I didn't blog.

My desire is to be authentic.  Change like this takes time to process. I wasn't ready to share all, therefore,  I simply wouldn't share any.

But the mundane, the happenings, "life" occurs, simultaneous with processing the symptoms of Parkinson's and how it changes our future ministry, family, life plans. I've wrestled the beast - and I will blog the mundane, while wrestling with the "big thoughts" - and I will share what I feel is needful and honoring to both Michael and God.

And under it all - God is faithful. His mercy NEVER fails. I prayed for my faith to increase as we retired from military ministry. My faith is increasing. He loves me enough to give me the deepest delights of my heart - even when I scream and cry and beg for something ELSE.  Who am I to complain at the tools He uses?

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