Another Court Appointment

Wednesday found this part of the family in Anchorage waiting outside of a courtroom. (Darla, that's the Captain Cook Hotel over their heads).  This month Krista is in Guam and Luke is working. Stacia is at a counseling appointment. Bre and Arielle are with kiddos. 

Cory, Alex, Nolan, Allie, Mike, Jared, Carrie & Jamin 

The event felt purposeless to ones who don't totally understand the intricate workings of the system. We were originally told it was a trial setting conference, but then that it would be more of a discovery extension as we were going to trial. In the end neither were mentioned. The judge mentioned a plea deal had been offered, and they set the trial setting conference for August with the trial possibly in November. The judge says he's happy with the pace this is moving, and we can tell by listening to cases where others are STILL in discovery 3 - 5 years after a crime was committed that we ARE moving quickly. We just don't always understand what progress is being made. 

To be clear we all hoped to avoid a trial and that a plea deal would be accepted...however, we all want to see some measure of justice served and if that requires a trial - a trial it will be. 

Bella, GG, Annie, Gideon, Jojo 📷by Bre

While we were in town GG had a play date with Bre and the kids. They were playing Go Fish and Gideon caught him cheating. Sadly, a very familiar scenario. He was a bit surprised to be called out by his 7 yo great grandson. ::snort::  Stacia picked up dinner and GG after her appointment and we all met back home for a quiet evening. 

I'm blogging Thursday morning, after a night snuggled on the couch with tea and blankets. We can do hard things because our strength rests in God. I'm dealing with emotions again...and the desire that I could tell the defendant's mom all I think rather than sit silently. ::grin::   I have already allowed Holy Spirit to evaluate my heart and point out where I need to forgive - AGAIN. Bitterness will not take root in my heart. That is a victory I will win. 

Arielle sent these photos....It seems Ellie does NOT like tummy time...and her brothers are quick to jump to rescue her from tummy time torture. Such a petite package of perfection! 

📷by Arielle

📷by Arielle

Free from the blanket 📷by Arielle

But - the Garden

Tuesday found me at our lawyers at 0900.  Back at home I called to get info on federal programs for care of the elderly. NOTHING, it seems, is ever as easy as one is told it will be. 

I had about an hour until I needed to be at co-op. Co-op went smoothly and I was home early. 

We had plans to attend a baseball game where Jared was slated to throw the first pitch. The game was rescheduled due to inclement weather.  

Before I had plans to attend the game, I'd had plans to go to dinner and a movie with Nolan and the girls or attend swim lessons with the grands. Those plans were back on - but I was too emotionally and mentally exhausted to join anyone. 

But - the garden! 

Given time we may actually end up with an accessible strawberry bed...and strawberries to enjoy. 

I started a pot of basil. It has to grow in the greenhouse. 

Peppers like the greenhouse

More beans...hope they are warm enough

As soon as the weather cooperates and the guys can finish covering the hoop house, these cucumbersare ready to go. 

This little tomato plant is putting out some growth. 

Around the Fire

 This eyesore caught my attention each time I looked out of our living room window.  What could it be? Why that's our barricaded fire ring...and it's taken on a bigger and bigger significance in our minds. You see, Josiah was ALWAYS up for a fire. He loved to sit around the fire and visit, share memories, tell stories...and so do we. However, many of our favorite campfire memories include Josiah. 

We were sitting around the campfire in Crescent City, CA in 2016 when Josiah told us he was moving back to Alaska. He invited us to move up with him and said he'd help us with Michael's newly diagnosed (at that time) health concerns. 

There was the first time Liv joined us around the campfire for s'mores when Josiah and Carrie had first begun dating. 

Who can forget the night when a young rooster jumped into the campfire and back out - earning himself the name Phoenix? 

Josiah, Jamin, Jared, Michel and Stephen around the fire ring after Josiah and Carrie's wedding. 

There were also campfires on New Year's Eve. NYE has long been our family's biggest celebration. Since moving to AK, it included a firework display (funded and shopped for by Josiah and Michael) and a bonfire. Michael laid out wood and covered it up last fall just as the first snow was predicted. It was ready and waiting for our NYE celebration. 

NYE this year did not find us sitting around a bonfire or even at our home. Josiah was newly departed, and we were in the throes of deep grief. 

The weather changed and still none of us had the heart to light a fire. AND the wind hasn't cooperated. Carrie had a fire at the lake over Memorial Day with her family and encouraged us to light the fire....and so tonight we uncovered the fire ring and lit the wood beneath. 

Yes, there were some somber thoughts. I may have shed a few quiet tears, but it was good. His memory was with us around the fire. Michael read a chapter of McManus and one from one of Allie's favorite books. Allie's new guitar was a rousing success. I read a chapter from McManus. We had s'mores. We chatted. We laughed...and it was good. 

Fixing the perfect s'more

garden sleeves to allergy proof Stacia

10:30 p.m. 

Allie's pet stink bug 📷by Allie 

My turn to read 📷by Allie 

And then, there was the moment when Michael threw a box onto the fire...I promise we learned our lesson! Please, don't hesitate to join us around our fire this summer.  We've noted which things need to be moved to make it safer for young ones. In the future, Michael will be much more careful about throwing waxed boxes onto the fire...and I will be more careful about staying much further than 2 feet away from the fire ring. I took a photo and still didn't realize I was in trouble. 

  I tried to get up and it was far too hot for me to stand - which requires taking a step forward out of the chair.  It took a few moments for them to realize I needed help. My yelp of, "I need help!" probably alerted them. ::grin:: Michael jumped over and pulled me out of the blast zone...and that is how I ended up with a flash burn on my legs from a box of broccoli. 

This is a much better view from the window. 

Waiting...and Sunday

Sunday's message was on waiting....waiting for the promise, waiting to step into what we know we've been called to do, waiting...We are certainly in a season that includes much waiting.  The sermon was preached by Paul Peterson, an Army Chaplain who attends ACF.  He made many good points from the life of David. This one resonates with me in our current season, "I don't know what God is going to do but I'm not going to rush what He's doing."  Chaplain Peterson shared David waited well because he nurtured his friendships and developed his faith in the wait. As I contemplate waiting, I realize many times we are not waiting for something exciting but for something we dread. 

Currently, heaviest on my heart is waiting for a trial I never wanted to attend. Colleen, a wonderful lady from church, stopped to see how I was really doing today. She told me she was sorry to hear the DA's offer hadn't been accepted. She had wanted to share with me the thought that maybe I shouldn't do that hardest of things...sit in the court room and watch the video of my son being killed. We didn't have time to really talk...but she shared being on a grand jury and watching a video she will never be able to erase from her mind. I told her our plan was to avert our eyes and not watch. She said we'd still hear. I was INSTANTLY transported to a summer day in San Antonio when Josiah reached over the fence to pull himself up in his quest for an errant ball. He grabbed on to a bunch of wasp's nests on the neighbor's side of the fence. They attacked. As I sat in church, I could hear his screams and the agony from that day...and it multiplied in my head as I contemplated the video. I hadn't even contemplated this part of the trial and I'm glad Colleen cared enough to voice her concerns this morning. 

Krista is flying to Guam today. It was fun to see Luke and the kids, Carrie, the girls and Jess and Jamin. We caught lunch with Jamin and Carrie and the girls. Can you believe this sweetheart is waking her Mama up every 45 minutes. Please pray for her to sleep better. Carrie needs rest.

📷by Carrie

Our weather is nice enough to pull out SUMMER CLOTHES! 

Girls' gotta keep up with her friends - 📷by Jamin

Luke and the kids were talking about dropping by. I don't know if they dropped by before we got back to town or if their plans changed. LOL We made a stop by Bre's to drop off birthday goodies. 

Michael, GG and I took naps. The girls headed to the swimming hole. Millie has a sweet set up in Stacia's car....she has a bed, a suctioned water bowl and a tie down. 

Millie rides in style. 📷by Allie

📷by Allie

Stacia made peanut butter/chocolate frozen bananas.  We had planned to have a fire, but the wind picked up again as we were about to begin. 

We watched the end of season 1 of Scorpion. It's hard to go to bed before midnight now that the sun is still up and shining.  Ah, the beautiful long days of summer. 

Happy Birthday, Bre!

 We'll celebrate on Saturday, but we I can't let the day go by without noting the auspicious day. We kept missing each other, but we dropped off some birthday surprises on her doorstep. In our family we tend to leave the "day" for individual families to celebrate...and we celebrate as a family one time a month - because otherwise the "family as a whole" would begin to take over individual plans. ::snort:: 

Bre is our first born. She's always been amazingly mature for her age.  I always had a Mother's Helper with her in the home; and she trained Krista and Arielle to follow suit. LOL  I went looking for photos and find that mostly I have kids' photos...so here's one of her darlings.... BTW all the girls should be forewarned I will be out to get photos of THEM as I realized I have very few with Mamas and a whole lot of photos of grands...

Gideon, Annie, Trudy, Bella, Jojo

It's been a joy to watch the woman of God Bre has become. She LOVES Jesus. She lives a LIFE of worship. She's had ups and downs, grieved the loss of babies and now a brother...and yet this girl's faith is solid - it stands through the tests.  Bre is one of my favorite people with which to spend an afternoon.  

I remember sitting with her 37 years ago. Michael was at work. I was a bit lonely as all my friends were busy with classes. I was one of the first to marry and have children. Bre and I went out to Bob's burgers. She was about 2. She set in her highchair and chattered away...about an amazing array of topics. I caught a glimpse that day of how fun Bre was going to be and what good friends we would become. That picture encouraged me through the years of lots of littles...and now I have some of the best friends in the world as the Gherkins "age." 

Am I saying "age" a lot? Bre is nearing 40. I still feel like *I* am 40 and here she is rushing into spaces I didn't fully realize I'd moved on from. LOL 

Happy Birthday, Bre! 

A Beautiful Saturday

Ah the sweet, simple joys of summer. Is there anything more relaxing than watching a garden sprinkler after a good bit of work in the garden? The white box in the corner of the nearest bed is a "bug hotel" Benny made at the library. He brought it over for the garden. 

It's been a lazy and glorious day. Everyone else slept in...which means I had time to dig into Habakkuk. GG didn't wake up until after 10 a.m.  We took advantage of the nice afternoon to hang out on the deck. 

While on the deck we heard GG talking to friends on the phone. It seems he would love to go on a walk, but no one around here will take him. We can rarely cajole him into a walk. Nolan showed up to hang out. I suggested he and the girls take GG for a walk.  GG couldn't turn them down as we'd heard his desire to go for a walk. ::snort:: He actually went WAY further with them than he goes with me. We may keep sending them out on this endeavor. 

Stacia, Nolan & GG 📷by Allie

Michael continued to work on our stubborn sink. I weeded the final garden bed, assembled a solar powered wind truck thingy, washed and folded garden bed covers, and moved a motorcycle to the garden. 

Final bed weeded 

When one sows directly into the ground, one does not always know what is a weed and what is a plant. I have learned I have to let the weeds just grow until I can tell the difference. I was reaching to pull this weed when I realized - it's right where I sowed beans! 

Today's harvest...it's a start. 

Stacia's thrift store find!

The girls and Nolan came out and kept me company while I weeded and such. At one point left over sodas were brought out. We even had a sugar free cream soda. I enjoyed it...yes, I wear an apron in the garden to try to save my clothes...and because it's handy to hang the Thermacell on it and it also helps to keep my tools handy. Can you see the swarm of mosquitoes in the photo below - all the dots? I don't go outside without the Thermacell. 

At dinner time the kitchen was still not functional. Nolan and the girls ran out to the deli and brought a selection of fine foods home to eat.  Jared was out here in the valley at an event hosted by the Moms of Liberty - I've not heard of this group. He was on a panel fielding questions about parental rights. He came on over when he was finished and joined us for dinner. 

Michael got the sink working, we put the kitchen back together, I started washing dishes. The power went out 5 minutes into the first load of the dishwasher. We had hoped to have a fire tonight, but the wind was ferocious. The guys went home. These two played "Jelly." 

Our temps got up to 70 at our house.  saw 71 and didn't check later in the day. In year's past Josiah has brought Liv out to the Colony Day parade. I didn't feel like attending the parade today. We needed a day to hang out at home. It's been a beautiful Saturday. 

More Friday Happenings

Bright and early Cory and Benny and Danny showed up. Cory had found an ad for a family moving into state who had cardboard to be hauled away. He and the boys picked up Michael's truck, got cardboard and two more loads of wood chips today.  

Danny & Benny - 📷by Cory 

The girls and I headed out at 0800 for breakfast. With finals and life we've not been out for a bit for our study. Sometimes life is hard and the three of us ended up laughing so hard, the GIRLS snorted, and we all cried. This all started as we shared how to pronounce Habakkuk...and then looked it up online...later we queried others.  It was good. 

Receiving a gift from Jennifer, an online friend, while at the cafe was the icing on the cake of life. Our local community/social circle has shrunk in the past months - but the online communities: missionary kid community, ministry community, blog community and military community have sure walked with us...and we love them even more for it. 

We went home by 1000 so Stacia could have a Japanese lesson. The boys enjoyed the time to play with Allie on the trampoline.  The girls had lunch and we met at Bre's for our Colony Day adventure.  

I laid a couple of boxes out in the garden until it was time for me to go to a counseling appointment where we continued to discuss HARD things, and community building, and faith. Josh continues to assure me I am not in danger of losing my faith. I am honest with God and my emotions. In fact, he shared I appear to have a deep faith...and others may not know how to handle me because we've gotten used to quick, happy, social-media meme faith. I'm living with faith and God in the broken and messy places. AND, since I'm allergic to the happy church face thing...it's a bit raw and authentic for the very ones who say they desire authenticity in faith. Hmm...do we really? More to think about. This I know...God is with me. Always with me. Still with me.  He sits with me in the messy. He heals the broken. 

We received news of a local hurting family. We made plans to reach out. We had dinner - trying to eat without a sink is interesting. I was not in the mood to watch TV ... the garden is a great place to relax at the end of the day and process.  I miss summer nights around the campfire. 

I love the wood chips! It looks so much more like a real garden! LOL Everything is biodegradable and so as the garden grows we can till it all into the ground. 

Note the red chair and little tea stand. I moved it around trying to find the best place for it. I thought I'd move it to the back and could see the entire garden...but then I realized I didn't want my back to the woods where I couldn't see moose and bear approaching...but then I realized I was sitting at the front and the moose came from the direction of the house. Hmmm...and then I realized the red chair makes one lean back very far and isn't a very alert position. It was getting chilly anyway, so I went to the chair in the green house. Stacia and Millie found me there and we had a nice discussion. She also misses the evenings of visiting....so it's time to switch from winter vegging to interspersing times around the table or campfire or in the garden - especially during the lovely LONG summer evenings. 

I decided it's only right to show you the areas of the garden space we have NOT tamed yet. LOL 

All the areas behind the metal baptistry and hoop house and then to the south of the hoop house are still a horse pasture covered with weeds and thistles. 

We are so THANKFUL for all the hard work Cory put into this project this week! In many ways it's an "extra" project we wouldn't have gotten to at all. The garden would have been planted but the weeds would have continued to win the morale war. As I set and pondered, I decided a pavilion is too much for this year with all the other projects, just getting the weeds tamed with chips is a good garden project for this year.  I do think I am going to paint the outside of the weather looking garden beds. I will do some thinking on if I can do that now or need to wait until we harvest this year's crop.  I'm thinking some fun colors would appeal to grands. 

Michael continued to wrestle with our kitchen plumbing. He has poured a gallon and a half of liquid plumber down our drains, he's taken them apart and snaked them out, there is sludge he can't reach. He talked with Luke, our son in law who is a plumber, and is going to try to rent some jet-propelled pump to get it unclogged. Meanwhile the unwashed dishes from Thursday sit. I so appreciate Michael and Cory.