Morning Musings
Another 10.25 miles this a.m. on the bike (oy my aching tush!!). I happened to be out riding at the time that young mothers and old mothers were getting their sleepy kids into the car for the daily trek to the day care. Kids were queuing up for their chance to enter that big, yawning, yellow transporter called - bus.
As I pedaled and prayed I began to realize how incredibly blessed I am to be able to stay at home with my children. It is easy to get burned out at home. There is never an end to the work that needs to be done. There is never a sense of “there I’ve played all they want me to play”. There IS a great sense of purpose…but it is easy to begin to think “if the kids were at school or I was working we could….” Today I’m filled with thankfulness to God and Mike for blessing me with the opportunity to stay home and mentor my children. I committed to being more aware of HOW I’m using this very pricey and valuable time. I need to find the balance between work (school and house), play (park, friends, computer, games, etc), and ministry (husband, children, chapel, computer communities). As I wrote a few weeks ago – I need to resist camping out at weariness. The best way to do that is to develop an attitude of gratitude!
I am thankful for a husband who values my mission, calling and contributions at home. He is willing to live without all the perks “The Jones’” have so that we can invest into the young lives with which God has blessed us. I need to honor his commitment to my staying home by embracing this time at home, using the time wisely and not dreaming of all the things I’d like to have and do (elliptical machines, LCD computer screens, vacations to Europe and Hawaii, every last piece of curriculum that crosses my path, days at the spa, romantic weekends away with Mike….). He works hard to provide me with the opportunity to spend this time at home….and I need to value this time.
Our neighbor runs a day care. I’ve watched those sleepy toddlers show up at 7:30 a.m. and go home at 5:30 or 6:00 p.m. often they are in tears as they leave her home (which means she is a great day care provider!). I get mildly irritated when Stacia cries every time someone other than me tries to hold her (chapel, park, doctor’s office) and yet it would break my heart if she cried when she left the sitter to come home. I’m thankful that she is attached to me.
So often young moms are told “this time goes so quickly and they’ll be in school and you’ll have a life again”….but God has seen fit to plant me in this season for almost 21 years now. I must resist thinking “if the kids were in school the house would stay clean, I could go for lunch with buddies, I’ve done plenty of time at home” etc. I HAVE A LIFE!!! right now and it is tailor made for ME. A loving Father knows that there is nothing like these little arrows to sharpen me….to motivate me to deny self, to be consistent in the little things one more day, to work on my sharp words and selfish attitude one more day….A loving Father knows that if I were working I’d not have time to volunteer in the chapel and in the community. I’d not have time to enjoy the children. Yes, *I* like variety. *I* like to be running around town with kidlets in tow…but God has called me to see the value in staying home and mentoring and discipling the plants around my table.
I don’t judge those who are on a different path than I, but neither should I envy them their path. I must value the path that God has placed me on. I need to STAY on that path. It is very easy to be a “stay at home” mom who is never home. I could fill considerably more than 40 hours a week volunteering, mentoring, playing and never accomplish the mission that God has placed before me.
Thus ended my morning musings….
