For the first time in my life I find myself dreading the end of a vacation. I’m usually SO ready to be back in my CLEAN home after these camping excursions. I’ve spent a lot of time today evaluating what is going on in my heart. I’m not totally sure at this point. Here are a few things I’ve pondered:
I enjoy our town in TX….I enjoy our ministry….I enjoy my friends…I enjoy my home and family….so WHY do I not want to go home???? Why do I tear up as we get closer to “home”?
“Home is where your heart is” and my heart is split and in several places. I can look ahead to next summer very easily, as we realize our vacation next year will be wrapped around a MOVE…and we’ll leave one or two more children at that time. In a very strange sense I felt more at HOME at the foot of the Sangre de Cristo Mountains, or at the USAF Fam Camp, than I do in our home of 3 years. I LOVED all 11 of us together again. It’s such a blessing to watch adults interact with pre-schoolers…love, concern, joy, laughter, grumbling…it’s good. I laugh about how much MORE food it takes when we are all around….and I enjoy cooking for a crew that includes two teens and four adults. I love having Mike close and available for discussions. I love having two adult daughters to discuss “life” with….I enjoy more one on one time with my 11 ½ year old daughter… I don’t feel ready to get back to our “new normal”.
I suspect it’s all about surrender, once again. This IS the phase of life and family season that I am in. I must surrender and walk in joy and contentment. They can’t possibly stay young forever…and some day in the next decade they’ll begin to bring home spouses and grandbabies and I’ll wake up in a new season once again….and need to remember the lessons I’m learning this week.
Jamin finished editing his second novel late last night in this bldg
This water is COLD!!!!
Gotta run and listen to, "Kerplunk" by Patrick McManus!