SAD, SADDER, SADDEST!!!

I clicked publish.

I put in our produce co-op order.

I did my crunches (gotta get this life organized!).

I headed for the showers and stopped dead in my TRACKS!!!

I know I've been eating a handful of M/M's several times a day. I figure one M/M = 10 calories and YES, I've been tracking them. I KNOW there was a handful left for today but there are none!

IF you really want to OD on Chocolate check out this cake that Liz told me about. ::Snort::

My *ATTEMPT* at a photo essay - Yesterday's Recap

I said I was getting my LIFE organized - not my home - just to clarify. This is much bigger than my home. ::snort::

I began by going to

I went a bit later than normal and didn't have to deal with the ladies asking a lot of questions. I went again this a.m. and saw the trainer who knew me. She asked questions. She was sorry. I figure if I go later one more day, the regulars will know by next week. I don't REALLY mind going at 7:30. Later, during the chit chat that goes on when you are at a new time and no one knows you, one of the ladies said, "9 kids - any twins?" and I said no and teared up. I guess I got my crying in for today early. ::sniff::

OK - yesterday I determined to do what so many of you do. I would capture the day with photos since I have a handy dandy small camera in my purse. I'll save my comments for later....Here's my a.m.

I loaded up tons of boxes, newspapers, and 4 younger children.....

(Note cars behind me were not appreciative of me taking this photo).

I had a list of things to buy. I didn't want to venture to the Gates of Hell with the younger set...so I thought I could find the laundry baskets, hamper, and ant traps somewhere else that I could go to Sam's for the grocery items. This would save me time because Walmart always takes me forever. Seriously, I'm a bit ADD and the busyness and crowds in Walmart really distract me.....as well as Zander doesn't do so well with tons of fluorescent lights and lots of strangers bumping into him.

We went to Tuesday Morning....

no baskets, hampers, or ant traps but we bought this duck.

We went to the Dollar Tree...

no baskets, hampers or ant traps but I let everyone buy one item (I bought a hat that matches Stacia's, focus is funky on this little camera).

Finally - I gave up and went to

We were run into 3 times by folks rushing out of an aisle and not looking where they were going. OK - this doesn't usually matter but I had Stacia IN the cart and Zander rides on the end of the cart - so he got squashed three times (slow learner? - very determined! ::snort::). Arielle and Nolan wrestled with a second cart behind me.

Zander - a bit JAZZED after the Walmart experience! ::snort::We got all we needed but the ant traps.

Came home for lunch and decided not to take any more photos of the day..... OK - having a camera handy is nice - but I will NOT be taking all those lovely photos of our outings.....why???? Because I realized as I left Walmart that um.....those of you who have the lovely minute by minute photos....don't have a 5 and 2 year old in tow. I held up traffic in stores all over town as I snapped shots, I wasn't thrilled with the workings of the handy camera, it made our trip take much longer and now blogger won't load the photos. ::snort:: Too much stress. I'll keep the camera in my purse for those times when I've forgotten to bring the Nikon or for the pool....LOL BUT I'm not going to ever be as great as some of you at recording every minute. I failed...maybe in a few years when I don't have a toddler????

As for the Walmart dilema? They LOVE me in there. They LOVE the kids. It just frazzles me...but it certainly would have saved me time in the end to simply go their first. Hmmm....on the other hand their milk is so much more than Sam's that I do have to run to Sam's today...there is no way out of these silly grocery trips - as much as I co-op and shop by mail. ugh.

Back at home we spent the afternoon working on my "to do" list and some "home organizing things". I'll share those later. Maybe I'll take a few pictures. Basically, I found MY CHORE CHART in the SHS files....revamped it and started that system again. ::snort:: AND the little chore flip chart I'd ordered for the younger set arrived - which is why I needed 4 laundry baskets - more on that later.

I had a MOUNTAIN of laundry to do. Seems that one son during the hail storm covered his car with blankets. Another son the next day was told to clean the back yard. First son had spread out blankets to dry. Younger son put wet, really wet, blankets in the linen closet. Fast Forward to yesterday afternoon. I opened the linen closet and thought our water heater had sprung a leak as Shanna's did because the blankets were all wet...but no....younger son admitted to putting away a really wet blanket...so we washed blankets (was one of those seasonal jobs anyway ::snort::).

Mike got to use the Celebrate plate last night. Yippee!!! A contract was signed in Dallas (finally) and we are going to have a new chapel on our base. It is slated to be done in 500 days - we shall see. Note: I did cook dinner last night, he hadn't filled his plate.

I spent the rest of the evening working on the To Do list and folding a LOT of laundry. Stacia was a bear to get down and I had no time to blog. The To Do list goes on....but I'm getting my life organized.....

**Hmmm....not sure about the spacing or the centering - but every time I try to fix it - it deletes photos. My time is UP.

Menu for Week of June 3

Monday - Scholotsky's

Tuesday - Burger Burn, oven fries

Wednesday - Meatloaf - softball @ 7:00

Thursday - Oven Fried Chicken, pilaf - Cival Air Patrol

Friday - Chaplain & Spouse Dinner/ Homemade Pizza

Saturday - Parish Appreciation Dinner

Sunday - Eat Out - Probably not - we'll be sick of it by then! LOL

My Marinating Hour

I was frustrated I couldn't find my colored pencils this a.m. I simply can go no further in Esther or I Peter until I find those things. ::snort::

I read Psalm 23. Here are a few thoughts.

Verses 1- 3
I have a GOOD Shepherd.

Shepherds lead - really good shepherds - really lead.

I am not in my current situation because of rebellion. If I were, I would label it as sin and repent. I'm not in my current situation because of a freak of nature. My Shepherd leads. He goes AHEAD.

I can be so secure, so content, so satisfied with my Shepherd's presence that I rest in the middle of lush feeding grounds. I don't have to worry about provision - the Shepherd has always been there.

He restores me soul.

He guides me in righteousness.

Many would like to camp out right here. Many would like to skip verses 4 and 5 and go directly to verse 6.....many attempt to do this in their personal theology.....

Verse 4 - 5

Sometimes we find ourselves in the valley of the shadow of death. It is not death. Thank God that death is conquered. We do not grieve as those without hope. It is only the SHADOW of death; the shadow can be painful.

Sometimes we find ourselves in the presence of enemies.

Where IS my Shepherd? Did he lead me HERE or did I just stumble into this valley?

My Shepherd is IN the valley. His rod and staff are still guiding, protecting, and comforting me. His presence is still my great joy. I can be secure, content, and satisfied in the middle of the valley. He leads. He isn't running behind my circumstances. He has PREPARED food, comfort, nourishment, and fellowship for me in the valley - in the presence of my enemies.

He anoints my head with oil (oil often symbolizes the presence of the Holy Spirit - many believe). My cup is overflowing. I'm content, but I'm not content with scraps. My Shepherd is taking good care of me....right in the middle of verses 4 and 5....in the valley with shadows and enemies.

And eventually I will reach verse 6. Goodness and mercy (loving kindness) will follow me as I follow the Shepherd wherever He leads. Honestly, they follow me now. Ultimately, I will dwell in His house, in His intimate presence forever.

I can trust Him - in all things - in all situations - in all pain. I can find rest. I can choose contentment as I surrender to His care. So can you. It's all about surrender. If you need to have a spiritual temper tantrum - get alone with Him, voice your fears and disappointments. He can handle it. But remember - it will come down to your heart. Is He Lord? Is He God all by Himself? It will come down to surrender. I find rest, peace, joy, contentment, and a host of other really good things....as I surrender right there in the midst of the yuck!

PS - promise not to preach any more on my blog today.

Midnight Hours

Yesterday evening Zander told me, "Mom, the babies in your scomach died and we cried. You shouldn't of let those babies in your scomach die - go get some more?" I've already struggled - and taken captives the thoughts that threaten to overwhelm. Mother's Day: "What kind of a mother are YOU - you can't even keep your baby safe?" But I know to react calmly to little ones questions - they are simply processing the situation as best they can. We talked. I didn't cry.

Then we went out to eat and there was a tiny baby fussing at the table next to us. Stacia was fascinated and went to visit. They turned the seat so she could watch. She loved it. She cooed and was sweetness itself (shew)! ::snort::They had named their baby a name I was hoping to use this time. It made me sad.

At home I had a message from PBS that a book I'd auto requested was on it's way to me: Supernatural Childbirth.

After everyone else was asleep I spent some time alone, praying. I cried. I reminded myself that Paul said he'd LEARNED to be content. I taught myself a few things I'd taught before. Being a Bible Teacher is so much fun - those words are always rattling around in my head somewhere. Honestly, it IS a blessing. {G} I chose again (and will do it repeatedly, as often as necessary) to be content, to be satisfied with this season of life, to recognize that my Shepherd leads and in short - to choose joy once again. Deliberately and repeatedly.

Maybe you are walking through a tough situation....one of those that doesn't naturally lead to joy and contentment. Even though your situation is totally different than mine - the lessons are the same. He leads. He's to be trusted. We have to repeatedly choose to rest contentedly. We have to deliberately and repeatedly choose to handle our trials in the way he Has instructed us. I picture handing the pain/trial/circumstance to him and telling him to squeeze every last drop of learning he has for me out of the thing before we move on.....maybe that way I'll be here less often. Or I can learn deeper lessons during the next trial?

GETTING MY LIFE ORGANIZED

I am by nature a perfectionist. (Alright - already - I can hear those who have known me in recent years yucking it up!!!!) I am a RECOVERING Perfectionist. I learned years ago that I was making my family CRAZY by my need to organize, plan, have every thing in its spot etc. I would chase around after them picking up dishes before they were through, moving newspapers when they got up to get a new glass of milk...that sort of nutso. I relaxed the standard. We no longer aim for perfection - excellence will do. We also loosely describe excellence in some seasons of our life. ::snort:: BUT I, personally, still feel better with lists, schedules, plans, CLEANLINESS......so I'm out to get my life back under control after the past few whirlwind months.
To manage as many circles of life as I do - I NEED TO BE ORGANIZED. I've been sick, not well, had major events, the miscarriage - frankly it was time to organize. So I spent the day working on getting my life back. Unfortunately that meant another day on the PHONE. I needed to organize co-op things, chapel things, school things, online things....and GRRRRRR Vacation things.

I had no idea what time it was until Mike arrived home and suggested we do THIS for dinner (two older boys were working):

Zander played a charming doorman

Then we came home. I set about to check more off the "to do" list. Mike and Jared went to get gas. I received a call and for the first time EVER Mike had locked his keys in the vehicle. We hopped in the Honda and went to the rescue.

Back home Mike and Jared helped me out of the "nothing to blog" dilema. Seems Cadet G of the Civil Air Patrol was told to lose the facial hair before Thursday.

Here's our traditional "it's time to shave" photo - Jared and Mike

Jared assures Mike he knows what to do with a razor!

And Stacia brings polish to Arielle for help with Chigger Relief, she had one on her tummy

A photo from Friday's Movie Night....note the polish on Arielle's neck. LOL Other daily tidbits: we cleaned, drained and moved the kiddy pool. A dove had dived into it and met its end. We got a bit of our "summer school" done. I found myself out buying Benadryl at 3:30 a.m. The ONLY time to shop at Walmart! ::snort::

Jared did another two lawns.

I'm looking for rental cars. Has anyone found a great spot for THAT - like maybe CRBO (Car Rentals by Owners)? ::snort:: I'm not sure if it's because we are trying to rent a car in Anchorage or because of the time of the year - but I KNOW we paid about 1/2 this cost when we were traveling two years ago. Anyway, if you have any tried and true site or such leave them in the comment section - ok? Or we may hitch hike while in Anchorage. LOL

Jamin and Josiah are home from work...time to bring this to an end.

Book Discussion Question

How are we all doing? I know that Lisa is through Chapter 8. I see some of the rest of you posting on the links?

I've slowed down as the pace of a section a week seems to be too much for most. I was trying to finish the book before we left on vacation and so that it would be finished on my Spring Reading Thing....BUT if you all are back on chapter 3 or 4...then I'll wait until next week to post more blurbs.

I think I will go ahead and read and save entries in draft and then I can post them while I'm gone if need be.

BUT how are you all doing? Remember this book can be incredibly convicting - but don't let Satan turn that to condemnation in your life. Conviction we take to the cross and we repent - turn and go a new way.