Chapter Three Quotes - The Grace of Encouraging Words - my comments italicized"Encouraging and affirming words - words of life, as I like to call them - have the power to give hope, to strengthen others to keep growing in righteousness. And if I, a grown woman, need them to keep going through hard times, my children need them even more." p 41
Shew - I need to remember not to just THINK good things about the children but to say them more often!
"Thinking good thoughts about someone doesn't really bless that person. We have to take the initiative actually to say the words - in person, through a card or e-mail, or even through a phone call." p 42 ::snort so simple/so profound.
"But the Lord's loving, encouraging words were not reserved just for Jesus' disciples. They are preserved on the pages of God's Word to lift us up today. The Whole Bible is filled with words that have given strength, encouragement, hope, faith, and forgiveness to believers in all times and all ages. God's encouraging words are so powerful, in fact, that untold numbers of people who read them have loved God, served his kingdom purposes, and died for his cause." p 44
YES - and really it doesn't matter HOW you get into the word (devotionaly, inductively, topically) just get into the Word...for your sake, for the kingdom's sake, for your children's sake.
"How important it is, then, that we mothers shepherds of our children's lives and hearts, choose our words to them carefully. We must deliberately aim our words at their hearts in such a way as to give our children hope, faith, strength, and also to point them toward the redeeming love of Christ. We can become the affirming voice of God to our children, just as we become a picture of his redeeming reality in their everyday lives. In this way we extend the gift of grace." p44. Starting to catch a glimpse of the giant responsibility and ministry there is raising children? LOL
"But a parent who would NEVER use words in such extreme ways can still "curse" a child with words. For instance, we can be so committed to training our children that we use most of our words to correct and admonish them.....Words of instruction and training are indeed necessary to our children, but we must be careful not to discourage them through nagging, criticism, and reprimands. Even more important, we must BALANCE our correction with words of encouragement and affirmation, words that our precious little ones will treasure in their hearts throughout their whole lives. " p 45.
From the prayer "Teach us to extol their positive characteristics whenever we can and to resist the temptation to use words only for correction."
This is a good reminder for me. Maybe you don't have the problem that Sally describes....seeming to use mostly words of correction. I know that in our family - with lots of young ones still in the early training stage - this is very easy to let happen. I also know that with youth - if not careful, if I don't run after their hearts and engage them it is easy only to interact with them when I'm instructing them. I love that Sally brings out that this is about BALANCE....not wrong to instruct and train...but also encourage...and make our words a blessing to our children. THINK about where we are aiming our words. I've shared before about my prior anger and the way I would talk to my children....what a great reminder to keep this issue before the Holy Spirit.
5 comments:
Planning to read tonight, I'm already behind! Having read it before I think it will be easy to catch up.
The great thing about having the entries linked here is that you CAN comment as you read. I'll check back and comment as folks comment and hopefully others will as well.
This is definitely something that I need to work more on. With three little ones in the house, I find myself only acknowleging those things that need more work and no time on the positive affirmation that my older kids need. It's easier when they are little.LOL When Isaac listens, I tell him what a good thing he has done! But when they are older, I need to remember that they need that positive reinforcement too. Good Stuff!!
Oh Lisa - I see the same thing in myself. I wonder if it's because society tells us that teens don't value their parents opinions...KWIM? I find when I take the time and talk to my teens they open up - they are willing to talk - and when I remember to tell them what they do that I like, what they do that makes me proud to be their mom....well it's priceless. I need to remember to do this more with the older ones.
You mean I'm not the only one?lol I had a nice talk with both older kids after they got back from their trip. It was really nice to spend some time with them.
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