Hmmm....Expecting a Miracle? Some thought that title a bit persumptious. Some know my story and smiled big. Let me share a bit.
I don't talk about this often because the past is redeemed and I see no reason to wallow in it...and God is constantly amazing me with new things, no time to dwell in the past. ::snort:: I'm a conqueror of child abuse (not a survivor, not a victim). It happened a LOOOONNNNGG time ago when I was a wee child in Africa. Anyhow, because of the abuse I was told that I'd never conceive. I remember well the day I told God that He was enough and I would be content with whatever children He blessed us with.
THEN I conceived our first child and lost it, I was told because of the abuse and my whacked out thyroid, I'd never carry a child to term. With those dire predictions ringing in my spirit I found myself pregnant within 6 weeks. Obviously, I was conceiving. I had yet to carry a child to term. I was depressed for the first trimester - I don't think I got out of bed for 3 months except to go to the doctor. Mike deserves an award. Bre was born. Over the years, I've had several docs comment on how hard conception must be for me - so I know the comments of the first doc weren't simply off the wall.
A friend told me several years ago that Satan meant the abuse for ill and that every time I conceive it's God saying "take that - I redeem". Not sure how doctrinally sound that is - but it gives me a big smile. I've had 15 pregnancies to date - 9 children carried not only to term but PAST TERM and 5 miscarriages. I believe each one of those 14 children are a gift of grace and a miracle. I can't begin to explain the WHY of the miscarriages. I won't try. I simply know that God is good and loving and that He has blessed me more than I ever imagined when I prayed that prayer of surrender over 22 years ago.
And so today, when I'm so nauesated that I can't even EAT CHOCOLATE, I remember that I'm living a miracle. Life is precious and being pregnant today is a blessing.
I don't talk about this often because the past is redeemed and I see no reason to wallow in it...and God is constantly amazing me with new things, no time to dwell in the past. ::snort:: I'm a conqueror of child abuse (not a survivor, not a victim). It happened a LOOOONNNNGG time ago when I was a wee child in Africa. Anyhow, because of the abuse I was told that I'd never conceive. I remember well the day I told God that He was enough and I would be content with whatever children He blessed us with.
THEN I conceived our first child and lost it, I was told because of the abuse and my whacked out thyroid, I'd never carry a child to term. With those dire predictions ringing in my spirit I found myself pregnant within 6 weeks. Obviously, I was conceiving. I had yet to carry a child to term. I was depressed for the first trimester - I don't think I got out of bed for 3 months except to go to the doctor. Mike deserves an award. Bre was born. Over the years, I've had several docs comment on how hard conception must be for me - so I know the comments of the first doc weren't simply off the wall.
A friend told me several years ago that Satan meant the abuse for ill and that every time I conceive it's God saying "take that - I redeem". Not sure how doctrinally sound that is - but it gives me a big smile. I've had 15 pregnancies to date - 9 children carried not only to term but PAST TERM and 5 miscarriages. I believe each one of those 14 children are a gift of grace and a miracle. I can't begin to explain the WHY of the miscarriages. I won't try. I simply know that God is good and loving and that He has blessed me more than I ever imagined when I prayed that prayer of surrender over 22 years ago.
And so today, when I'm so nauesated that I can't even EAT CHOCOLATE, I remember that I'm living a miracle. Life is precious and being pregnant today is a blessing.
7 comments:
De'Etta, I'm rejoicing with you that you're living a miracle.
I pray for you and your precious miracle several times every day!
Oh thanks - keep it up!
DeEtta,
As always, praying, praying. It truly is a miracle isn't it. Praying for a continued enjoyment of that miracle and a desire for chocolate again! LOL
And you have so many precious miracles whose faces you can reach out and kiss!
Dorothy
(((Hug))) Praying for you and your little miracle just like you did for me 10 months or so ago.
Thank you for sharing with us what wisdom God has given you in your various situations. It encourages me to look at things differently.
Jen in Az.
De'Etta,
Great reminder!
I also have conqured abuse as well.
Laura
SHS
How wonderful! Thank you for sharing that.
Kathy in TX (UT soon)
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