Warning there is a mild photo of Michael's stomach at the end of the post. If you think that immodest, just don't read this - click away now. Don't leave comments about immodestly or inappropriateness - it's our family journal and I want a photo.
Several have asked for a Michael update.
This season in our lives is certainly not about me. I write - therefore - you get my perspective. This has been a rough season for Michael. We went in on 7 Jan expecting a same day laparoscopic surgery.....he is still not feeling "chipper."
Care giving is not for the faint of heart or the sour of disposition. I am in awe of those who do it for years on end. We are three weeks post surgery. I've not been updating because the "lazy" days are full.
From the moment I roll out of bed there is something or someone who needs care...and that's o.k. but it can be draining. My schedule has resumed it's pace with homeschooling and ministry projects, Michael's hasn't. If we had known this was going to be this involved, I'd have made sure to have lighter weeks scheduled.
He's certainly doing much better than he was a week ago.
About this time last week Michael had a few days of vomiting and feeling generally terrible. We aren't sure what happened, but we're rejoicing the phase is over. I am still perplexed about why men rattle the rafters (or the heating vents) when they vomit. The kids were in awe of how Dad could be heard around the house.
Sleep patterns are hard right now - we're working to get back to normal. I'd say it feels like I'm burning the candle from both ends, but it sort of feels like the whole thing is one big, hot, melting mess of wax.
Monday he seemed to be feeling well and it seemed like a good idea to get out. I needed to pick up our van from the auto body shop, and that meant I was driving the car with the screaming brakes....I encouraged Michael to go on an outing, he wanted to be sure the brakes were o.k. . He got dressed - woohoo - wearing pants - and we headed across town. I got the van. The plan was for Arielle to drive home, Michael to continue sitting in the car while I ran to Sam's, and then drive home with the screaming brakes. I was counting this as a date. He couldn't. He got into the van and Arielle drove him home. He told me I had time after the brakes begin screaming before they go out. ::snort:: He spent the rest of the day in pjs and in bed.
There was hope he'd be back at chapel by now...but until he can wear pants it isn't appropriate and could prove awkward - military protocol being what it is. I've begun sharing "my mandate," - "You can't go to chapel or the office until you can wear pants." He'll be driving again on 10 Feb. I don't really WANT to drive him to work daily come to think of it. ::snort::
Wednesday we heard Mom G had been taken to the hospital in the middle of the night and had her own surgery. I guess she thought the boys were hogging all the fun surgeries. I know it weighs on Michael that he can't zip up there...but an 8 hour drive at this point is out of the question.
He is feeling well enough to sit and do some work, before he lays down again. He's off pain meds. He's still in sweats or Pjs.....but with "my mandate" ringing in his ears, Michael came down dressed....in PANTS today. Yes, I know it's a bad picture - but he's since removed the pants and I can't retake the photo.
He lasted a few hours, before donning his trusty flannel pjs. We're working towards wearing pants and staying up for a full duty day.....he has convalescent leave through 11 Feb. Maybe we can have PJ Sunday at chapel.....
I got a call at the end of Bible study yesterday. "This is Dr. Zanzi's office, can you come in tomorrow?"
"Yes, De'Etta. We can work you in tomorrow."
I know Dr. Zanzi. We spend a lot of time with Dr. Mrs. and Dr. Dr. but my brain is tired and I couldn't remember which doctor this was for ANYTHING. I feared it may finally be that dreaded colonoscopy referral. I wasn't going to commit to a doc until I knew what I was getting into. I finally replied, "Which doctor are you?
"Your dentist, De'Etta."
I went in. They wanted to check my gums....down to mostly 2's and 3's with a few 4's.....but the thing is I sat there for 45 minutes with darkening glasses, elevator music, and a massage chair....and yeah the little vacuum hose which I didn't pay attention to and left a hicky on the inside of my cheek....what WAS I talking about? Oh yes, I sat there and relaxed.....and prayed....and no one could call me, I couldn't do a thing for anyone, I couldn't answer a school problem or a phone call or email, I couldn't work on any ministry projects....my phone vibrated and clicked away with notifications...all I had to do was lay there and endure a numb mouth, water and suction for 45 min..... The 45 min trip both ways made for several hours of solitude. I call this self-care.
Dr. Mrs. came in at the end and said, "Wow. People don't usually look this happy when they are in here." ::snort::
I told her it was my happy place.
There you have it - an update on Michael.
I sure understand about the pants thing. I had to go buy a few pairs of 'stretchy' pants after my hysterectomy. I wore those all fall and wasn't able to wear a pair of jeans until just before Christmas. For me it had to do with general nerve pain across the entire abdomen. I wonder if Michael is dealing with some of that, too. Will continue to pray for him. And you, as caregiver! That is a tough job.
I think you summed it all up well... one big, hot melting mess of wax.
And I did chuckle about your happy place! :D
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