A Fabulous Friday

 Allie, Stacia and I needed to re-establish our Bible study routines. The girls, however, are immersed in Bible College. We wanted a bit of structure, but neither of them wanted a full-fledge study. We settled on going through the ACF daily devo's and using the SOAP method on the verses. I meet with each girl one on one, and we discuss the passages, and we do life together. The passages have the added benefit of preparing our hearts for the current Sunday sermon series. The upcoming series is titled, "The Deeper Life: Through Forgiveness."   This week we discussed grace, our view of God, really understanding and walking out the forgiveness He has lavished on us, redemption, and more GRACE, salvation and sanctification.  It's interesting in both discussions we focused on who GOD says we are...the messages on identity continue to bear fruit in our lives. I've been challenged by and enjoyed the discussions with both girls. Allie and I went to the cafe for Breakfast/Study this morning.

It's the little things that make me happy. I've been looking for the perfect highlighter and pens to use in my journaling Bible. Sharpie highlighters bleed through, my Pilot 2 pens bleed through. I found an acceptable pen. The perfect highlighters keep escaping me. I bought a couple of kinds of wax highlighters... they are gloppy and smudge and the darker colors black out the text.  Stacia is working on making a prophecy book for college and had crayons out. I used one and it WORKED! No smudges, easy to control the colors, consistent, no bleed through....so Allie and I stopped at Freddies to buy my own set. Certainly cheaper... 

Perfect highlighters for my Bible

Next up the girls and I visited Arianna and had our eyebrows waxed. We dropped Stacia off at the college so she could do some focused study. Allie worked at home. I started stretching a couple of bowls of dough. Michael told me he'd stretch the dough so I could grab a nap. 

Why did I need a nap? Because I was going to the THEATER tonight and didn't want to fall asleep. We started with a trip to a new eatery in town. The food was really good, and it was affordable for our area. 

Allie's panini was yummy

We are THOSE customers. We bought one dessert and shared it. It was fantastic! The peanut butter cheesecake was superb...and we each had "just enough". 

We met Jenni and Jamin at the theater and loved, "The Play that Goes Wrong." This one was pure fun. I think I liked the Hunchback of Notre Dame a bit better...but I think everyone else preferred this comedy. It's been second nature for us to go to the theater with Jenni and its great fun that Jamin joins us now. Michael prefers movies and is happy to stay home with GG so we can enjoy this. We LOVE the energy of a live play. 

We had a good laugh over the fact Jamin knows one of the lead characters. We can't take him anywhere these days. LOL 

It's been a good day. Tears, sadness, frustration...but lots of fun, connections and joy as well. 

We have another 3 - 4 inches of snow at our place! It looks like we may just beat the snowiest winter in Anchorage on record. We got way more snow in the last two storms out here, but I've not heard the records out here. LOL 

Photos of the newest Grandblessings from their families. 

Josi at nearly 2 months

These girls are sporting the bows!

Ellie at 1 1/2 weeks

Arielle overdid it a bit ago and is taking it easy these days. Cory had fun dressing Ellie today. 

GRACE NOTES: 

1. Each and every grand! 

2. A nap - and a husband that stretched the sourdough! 

3. A fun night out with the girls, Jamin and Jenni. 

4. Grace - so much grace; especially felt when life hurts! 

Fun Visits

I am happy to report I got a workout in today. The girls left at 0730 for college so I didn't have to worry about waking them up.  GG doesn't get up quite that early. Maybe this is the key to getting a workout in. I switched my Jesus time with the treadmill and got it all in. 

Stacia and I headed to the cafe for our "lunch/brunch study" after her morning class. 

I invited Carrie and the girls to come spend the afternoon with us...and stay for dinner. Jenni came over after work. It was a good time for Jenni and Carrie to get to know each other in a more intimate setting than a Family Gathering. Evelyn, a friend from our time in Hardin, MT sent this darling sweater for Josi. Josiah was 2 when we moved to Hardin and 8 when we entered the Air Force. 

Josi Faith - 3 days before her 2-months-old

Livie and Stacia made pirouette cookies.

Yep - splat, bake and roll...

We all played with Josi and commiserated with her over her 2-month vaccinations. 

Josi and Allie

Papa has the touch! 

After dinner the girls played a game of Taco, Goat, Pizza, Cheese (or some combination of said words). Carrie fed Josi and they headed up the highway. It was a great visit in the middle of the week. 

Liv, Allie, Jenni, Stacia

We settled down to knitting and watching an episode of "All Creatures Great and Small" with Jenni. I'm glad we are doing this series once a week....this is an aspect of our childhood the girls wouldn't fully experience in the time of binge watching. 

It was snowing this morning and has continued off and on all day. Yep. April 4th. This is our garden plot...we are a long way off from planting...I should start some seeds, but I have such a hard time getting motivated when winter seems to refuse to let up. The phone has a hard time capturing the snow....big, fluffy, lazily drifting flakes. They are beautiful. 

It is UNREAL that it was still light outside at 8:30 p.m. The snow began to fall at a much quicker pace...Michael says 2 inches are predicted overnight. I hope it's just 2 inches and not another 10 or 12 inches.  Jenni checked the lows next week are like 11 and 16. WHATEVER. 

Our living room transforms into a snow globe

GRACE NOTES: 

1. An afternoon/dinner with Carrie and the girls, as well as dinner and an episode with Jenni. 

2. A heart-to-heart conversation with both of our college gals! 

3. Laughter.

4. The Bible - oh, what a lifeline the Word of God has been. 

5. Magical snow - once again I'm not ready for the season to change. 

Wednesday

 Well...now...let's see... what have I done today...who have I talked to...where did I go? What can I share? 

Bread. I got bread.  I baked the boule - not pretty but tastes great. I baked another 9 dinner rolls...and got everything fed and started to bake another boule tomorrow morning. I'm playing around with how to do 2 loaves or rounds a day...but I only have one Dutch oven...so I am doing the rolls. LOL 

The girls' college schedules worked out so both are home on Wednesdays. It's been great to have a day with them around - even though they are usually sleeping in and hitting the books heavily all day.  I had a nice conversation with Allie this morning and another good conversation with Stacia this evening. 

I did get 3 miles in on the treadmill. 

Stacia requested stroganoff for dinner...I ran out to get sour cream. 

Michael was "off" and spent most the day in bed.  

GG took a long nap too. 

This was supposed to be our small group night. Our group has been paused as our leader is moving out of state. 

I spent an hour or so this evening helping Stacia get a new phone set up. 

Me: My daughter dropped her phone in a snowbank and then the plow man came and plowed the driveway. The phone is lost until the snow melts. She bought a new one and would like to keep her old number. It's a Straight Talk phone. 

Tracfone: I am going to send a verification code to your phone to authenticate your account before we can switch the phone number to her new phone.

Me: The phone is in the snow berm. 

Tracfone: Did you receive the code, maam? 

Me: The phone is in the snow. 

Tracfone: Ah - yes, it says it received it. 

Me: The phone is buried deep in snow. I don't have the phone.

Honestly, this gal was the BEST customer service agent we've dealt with from Tracfone AND she got it done much quicker than any of the other agents we've dealt with over the years.  It just took a bit for her to understand the significance of a phone being buried in a snow pile. LOL  She was surprised we have snow in April. 

GRACE NOTES:

1. I am so thankful for the Bible. I'm seeing lots of things in new ways this year as I read through it. 

2. A customer service agent that was very helpful! 

3. Everyone home for dinner. 

4. A lunch date to look forward to next week. 

A Tough Day

Today was not a good day and thus there is a bread photo! Actually, I didn't even bake bread today so it's an "activating starter" photo and not even a bread photo. We've been giving bread away lately and so I wanted to try to get two different things going today so I can bake both a Sourdough Boule and some sourdough dinner rolls tomorrow. 

It's been a hard day. I've never been prone to tears at the drop of the hat...but shoot the hat doesn't even have to fall these days for my tears to flow. I'm tired of it.  I'm tired of forgiving. I'm tired of choosing to love the unlovable. I'm tired of living with the unthinkable. I'm a bit tired of winter...and I am not looking forward to all the work the melting snow will uncover either. I'm tired thinking about yard work, house projects and gardening. 

I want what I can't have. I have surrendered, I've forgiven, I have hope, I accept the emotions - tears and joy...but really there is a missing piece which I'm realizing is simply not going to be filled. I'm tired of trying to learn to live without Josiah. 

So often a random sight or comment or thought, "I'd love to hear Josiah's thoughts on this," brings tears.  

How DID he create community wherever he went? As an introvert no less. It wasn't "second nature." 

How do you balance the needs of so many - when the needs are conflicting?

How would you help X with Y and Z? 

I need you to fix the budget spreadsheet again - can you show me one more time? 

How is any of this going to work out? 

And so, it's just been a hard emotional day. Michael's health is not doing well with the added stress of grief.  We're trying to get in to see a neurologist - but then his neurologist now lives in the lower 48 and flies up here to see patients every so often.  It all just blew today...I couldn't have even said WHY I was crying...

Then Stacia called on Allie's phone...oh yes, another thing that happened. Stacia had her phone in her jacket pocket when she went out to help shovel snow on Sunday. She didn't mention it was missing until everyone went home and it was dark. On her way out to the car to go to school she heard her phone vibrating....under the snow somewhere. I searched for over an hour for the thing. I couldn't find it. Shawn came to plow the driveway....we may find it when the snow melts in real spring...or summer...

Stacia got out of class early and was calling to see if I'd like to go with her to get a new phone. Michael told me to go - it may help to go. 

We got her a new phone and will try to set it up tomorrow. 

Michael made a great dinner for us - fried chicken, broccoli, corn and toasted sourdough bread. Stacia went to do some more homework. Michael and I cleaned up dinner. GG decided it was time for bed. Michael got him settled. I blogged. I decided to call it a day and not blog THIS DAY - TUESDAY but putting on a happy face isn't authentic. 

Anyway - I decided to watch the Baxter's on Prime Video - based on the Karen Kingsbury novels. I hadn't thought how the whole scenario in the first book would feel from this perspective....but I do recommend the series...with a warning for those who have had a loved one shot while his young wife was pregnant, ironically the character in the show is named Kari... it didn't turn out to be a great escape from the grief...but then again it gave me a reason to let the tears flow.  ::hiccup::  I should have thought ahead and skipped the final episode of Season 1.  I was pleasantly surprised there are already season 2 and 3 on prime. 

GRACE NOTES: 

1. Michael - I can't think of anyone with which I'd rather journey through this mess. 

2. Daughters that want to spend time with me - even when I'm in a funk. 

3. Thirty-four great years with Josiah.  And the lovely girls he brought into our lives! 

4. Carrie and the girls are home! 

5. It really was great to have Michael make dinner. 

April Fool's Day Dinner

I organized a meal train for CoRielle when Ellie was born. I signed up for a couple of dinners. I picked April 1st and then set about thinking of a fun menu for the boys. 

Michael ran to the store to find gummy worms...and to pick up Dad's meds. I assembled dirt cups...

I baked some brownies and Michael promised to turn them into "steak shapes."  While he was busy carving brownies, I emptied the last bit of ice cream from a carton from a favorite ice cream shop, I cleaned it out and refilled it.  

Brownies and ice cream....

 

Or is it ice cream? Shhh...I don't know if they've tried it yet...they tend to limit sugars. 

Kristine gave me the idea of starting with dessert first! The boys thought that was a GREAT idea. I made meatloaf in two 6 in cake pans...put sauce in the middle and frosted it all with potatoes. I tried to drizzle the sauce on top. 

We added homemade sourdough dinner rolls and mixed veggies to round out all the sugar. 

Benny had swim lessons until 5:30 so we headed over at 5:30 to deliver the meal. Benny met us in the driveway chattering away about having dived off the DIVING BOARD! I was SO impressed. I hugged him and told him how proud I was of him...and then he sheepishly said..."April Fools." We laughed at how he had "gotten me." 

Benny did comment that my cakes didn't look as good as Stacia's. ::snort:: GG hadn't met Ellie Rae yet and so this was the big meet up. No fears, we supported her little head immediately. 

GG & Ellie

Ellie and Papa

You and me both little gal! 

Arielle reported that Benny thought dinner was hilarious. We were glad to play a part in their April Fool's Day this year. Michael said we've probably started a tradition of pranking Benny. LOL 

Meanwhile this little angel is flying home from FL with her Mommy and sister. We can't wait to hug on them! 

Hey Sweet Josi! 

GRACE NOTES: 
1. Michael's help with the fun dinner. 
2. Living close enough to prank grandkids!
3. Safe travels for Carrie and the girls. 

Easter 2024

We were invited to go to Daniel and Joelle's after church for an Easter Brunch. Joelle is a friend, Bre's lifegroup leader, and Jenni's sister.  After a quick check-in with the Gherkins, it became clear this was a year when we wouldn't all be able to gather.  Carrie and girls are still in FL. KrUke had previous plans. CoRielle are one week into postpartum.  Nolan and Alex were working. We were free to accept the invite. Bre and family, as well as Jamin, would also be there. 

As the week progressed both Joelle and Bre had children get sick. We were now down to Jenni, Jamin and our household. We opted to continue with the plans for a potluck brunch after Church and just move the location.  Since we had attended Friday and Saturday services, we would stay home and prepare for Jamin and Jenni to arrive after their respective services.  We checked in with Nolan and Alex and while they didn't want to eat, they came over when off work and spent the afternoon playing games with us. 

I woke to this!!! Michael had said we were to get 1 - 2 inches of snow. The deck was clear when we went to bed. Kids checking in from JBER, Eagle River and even Palmer were saying 1 - 2 inches of snow. I was pretty sure we had more than 1 - 2 inches of snow. 

The deck was CLEAR Saturday night! 

It IS so much prettier than muddy snow and it covered all the pet and moose waste in the yard once again. It is MUCH easier to deal with chickens on frozen mud and snow rather than muck...all in all I was fine with 7th winter arriving. We've had an Easter storm every year we've lived here.  We weren't going anywhere but I didn't want Jamin or Jenni to get to stuck. I voiced my concerns.  I told them I thought we had more like 4 - 6 inches of snow here. I checked a couple of churches in town, and no one mentioned all the snow...so we preceded with plans.

Jamin drove down after camera duty at two services in Eagle River and we discovered - it was more like 10 - 12 inches of snow here. He went out to shovel the walk clear, Michael got up and helped...it was at least 12 inches. 

This was bare gravel last night.

It got funnier when Jamin called Jenni to see if she'd like a ride from MAG to our home. I guess he told her the roads were bad. She must have been perplexed as she'd DRIVEN to MAG and the roads were fine. She said the roads were clear, snow was melting to bare ground until about a mile from our street.  By the time she reached our driveway it was clear why Jamin had texted. There was NO WAY her little car was making it down our driveway. Well, it would come down - the question was if either of their cars would make it back UP.  She parked at the top of the street until Michael and Jamin got some space cleared for parking.  We played Frakle, Splurt, and Dominion. 

Alex and I checked out by Dominion, and Allie watched but didn't play.  Neither Monopoly nor Risk were attempted. 

All in all, it was a fun and relaxing day. Millie wasn't happy with the new snow situation...she LOVES to play in the snow...she's not so happy with the little snowballs that get caught in her fur. 

Random March Snippets

 All the random shots and "things" I didn't blog about throughout the month.  ALL photos of grands in this post were taken by sweet mamas. Thanks, gals! 

March 14th and Noah shows he's an Alaskan boy by his excitement at seeing SNOW!!!! It's that time of year - is it really break up or are we due for more snow????

Noah Bear

The above photo shows I'm getting back into some sort of routine...I've gone through my first 50 lb bag of bread flour. Yes, I've tried with whole wheat, and it simply doesn't rise well. I'm going to admit right here...they aren't very pretty but they TASTE good. LOL 

March 18th - snow out the window...one reason I'm thankful for the treadmill over outside walks. Winter - or Alaskan Spring.  It is also nice to avoid the moose and random bear. 

Willow is proving to be a great guard dog! 

Josi and Willow

I FINALLY found a protein drink I can doctor up enough to drink...but it made WAY too much to drink in one sitting (32 oz). I half it and I'm fine...stretches the ingredients out...low carb and 23 g of protein in 16 oz.  1/2 a protein drink, 1/2 C Greek yogurt, 1/2 a cup blueberries, some spinach...

Jared, Larissa and Noah (JaRissa) out campaigning!

I'd want this family as MY state senator! 

Gideon and Jojo 

Bre and kids and Joelle and kids spent a fun Sunday afternoon/evening dying and decorating eggs. Making memories! 

These two are just the cutest! 

Lucy and Trudy 

We're so glad these girls have been able to visit family in FL...soak up some sun on maternity leave. We are also glad they'll be home soon. 

Live, Josi and Carrie

As for the grieving... how in the world can such deep sadness exist with such incredible joy? I don't understand the depths of the human heart. March has been full, once again, of such sweet, sweet moments of joy...but it would be deceptive to pretend there does not continue to be intense moments of pain. The quote below is one I referred too often this month.